Desmond's World

July 21, 2007

Friday

So work came and went on Friday and I headed home for a quick nap and then prepare. My first time cooking for David.

The menu was pretty simple because I'm not usually a big cook but still it was above hotdogs or pasta. I made Chicken French which sounds a bit more interesting than it is. Its an East Coast thing and I used to love ordering in restaurants.

The chicken dipped in flour and egg (not breaded) and fried till almost done. Then re-added to a pan of butter and red wine to finish (topped with fresh lemon juice). Yum...

With the chicken was a baked potato and asparagus (mmmm). I set the table with a bottle of wine, and candles and scooby doo laying softly in the background (to satisfy the geek in us). We had banana cream pie for desert and eveything was wonderful.

At 9 he headed home and I was off to patrol. Castro was pretty festive when we started but I think the bars may have been having "straight" night because every fag decided to bring at least 1 fag hag, and straight girls without one must have been out hunting for one of their own.

Nothing too exciting to report. We finished and went to the Edge for a few.

This morning HP arrived on my doorstep. I went to breakfast with pup_ajax,tJohn and Kenji. Now on to a bubble bath and to begin the final journey of HP and the DH.

Posted by Des at 04:50 AM | Comments (0)

May 21, 2007

My Trip Days 1-3

So my flight to Rochester was good. I was fortunate to have 2 good people sitting with me on both the trip to DFW and to Rochester. The trip to Rochester had a hot guy who actually made conversation with me. Of course he kept mentioning his girlfriend lol.

I arrived in town Friday night and Kym picked me up. She looks great. I came back to see Stan, Marc, and Reid. Then the drinking started. I went over to Tara first which was a waste with the exception of seeing a couple of people I liked. There wasnt many people there and was as scary as everyone had said it was.

Saturday we went shopping for the BBQ. My sister came down with my niece and nephew, and my dad came up with his wife. It was good seeing them and getting to spend some time with them. Nadine came over as well who I have to say, looks fantastic.

That evening I went to the womens chorus concert and Kym had her solo. She was awesome and as soon as I can get the video reduced in size, Ill upload it to youtube. After the concert, it was barnight so I had my leather on. It was great because most people who apparently dont come out anymore, were out. I forgot that some people existed and was pleasantly surprised to see them. Insert another drunk night.

Last night I went to visit Jason (my little sister) at the bar. He started working again at Tara. There was only about 7 of us there but we were all good friends, and had a blast. Of course Jason fed me lots of shots and was drinking vodka cranberry all night for nearly nothing. Richard (Jasons psycho ex from about 5 years ago), kept coming in to stalk him. Ive been hearing how bad he looked through other people and the crank really has gotten to him. Still as dumb as ever and I came near to ripping his throat out. I think my barking scared him a bit (as well as many people who arent used to hearing me bark lol).

So thats been my weekend so far. Tonight I think Ill go out drinking lol. I have to meet some old coworkers for happy hour and then a few more friends to see late night. Im going to be a mess again.

Some pictures so far on flickr

Posted by Des at 09:27 AM | Comments (0)

May 14, 2007

Second Date and stuff

I had a second date last night with Alan who I met at Eagle beer bust 2 weeks ago. I really like him despite our different sexual interests and relationship views. I told him that I wore my cowboy hat out Friday night and apparently how popular I was (people approaching me left and right). He said I looked like Kenny Chesney with it on. I never heard of him and don't see the resemblance but hey, it was a compliment.

Friday was fun. Matt and I tore up the Castro and started our venture at Moby Dicks and The Midnight Sun. We determined these two places for us are like olives for me and banana bread for him. We know we don't like it but have to try it again every so often just to make sure we still don't like it. We continued to Edge and 440. I had a guy approach me as I was leaving. "are you leaving? I was hoping to get a chance to meet you". I also had a guy follow me into the bathroom and start masterbating next to me. I met a few more guys who caught my interest and finally at closing, Matt and I accepted a ride up the hill from a guy who doesn't work if he doesn't have to, who was heading to End Up, and mentioned he had some drugs if we wanted to go. Our quick answer? "we're going home".

Today Eagle beer bust is sponsored by the Sisters. Ill be there for sure.

Work has been fantastic. I couldn't have asked for a more fitting job and the amnities are exactly what I wanted. The people are great and I have beer Fridays again. Feeding me beer during my last half hour of work could be dangerous lol.

Posted by Des at 06:38 AM | Comments (0)

March 19, 2007

A Few New Pics

Posted by Des at 04:39 AM | Comments (0)

March 12, 2007

Switching

So recently Ive been getting to know my more dominant side and switching roles. Its funny how many doors open with just a change from bottom to top, sub to dom, boy to Sir, baby to Daddy.

Today I started the day with John picking me up around 10:30 and we headed down to Hayes Valley to meet sukk and spunky. The meeting was to discuss being a submissive switch in the leather community and what exactly our roles were. The question that seemed to come up what "What do we get out of it?". We talked a bit about how a submissive really does get to call some shots, and the concept of other Sirs who think that they can throw orders just because you are a sub. I may be a boy, but Im not *your* boy.

With that said, we also discussed switching roles. I brought up my new found interests and it was nice to have friends around me who dont judge me based on my experience in the scene. I can ask questions, and not be made to feel any less of a person because I dont know. I learned a long time ago fear in asking, usually ends up in stupidity.

After the meeting, we swung by my place and I picked up Zim. The 3 of us went back to John's house and watched the first few episodes. John and Spunky had never seen it and sukk and I were revisiting our love for the show again. There are so many references that I still get by watching the cartoon that are definitely adult in content but subtle enough to go over any kids head. I now know that a SIR is also a thermos.

Finally we ended up at the Eagle Beer Bust being sponsored by Cheer SF. We met up with Daddy Richard, and Ace showed up briefly. I have no idea where he ran off to.

We all did some playing in weird roles, and as Daddy Richard put it once it felt like a Star Trek/Buffy alternate reality episode where the subs were getting dominant. sukk licked my boots and we made everyone who walked by us pet the puppy. It was great hanging out with him more. He's a great guy and I always enjoy seeing him.

Finally I met a guy at random (go figure shy ole me). He's cute and I actually made a date with him for Thursday. Im excited and cant wait

Posted by Des at 02:24 AM | Comments (0)

March 10, 2007

A Really Great Day in the Life

So I havent really posted much lately. Its been a busy week and the time Ive had to relax, Ive been doing just that. I went out more than I should have this week but its all good. I called in sick on Wednesday basically because Ive been so stressed with work, and I realized, Ive actually taken sick days because I was actually sick, and havent had a day off for me since New Years. It was needed and over due. Im really anxious to get back to Rochester and Chicago in May to unwind and recharge.

Today was a great day. I finally got my Invader Zim volumes I, II, & III and have been watching volume I Doom Doom Doom. I just cant get tired of Zim and absolutely adore GIR. had a crush on GIR and I realized after watching the first few episodes, how much I do as well. I cant wait to have a Zim Marathon.

On the same note of Zim, I found a T-Shirt that I absolutely want. I forgot how many piggish references are out there and the T-Shirt says "Prepare you bladder for imminent release". Its so gonna be mine.

Today was the best though and not just because of Zim. John and I started out with breakfast at Bagdad. The weather was great and it was nice to be out in the sun with a tank top getting some color. While sitting down at Bagdad, I noticed a guys sitting there at one of the tables who looked familiar. I finally placed him as an old friend from Rochester whom I hadnt seen in about 4 years. I actually had to ask if it was him because its been so long. Sure enough, he is here visiting and lives in NYC now. How funny running into people you know out of the blue like that.

On another note, John got his new camera (which I have to say, he got a fantastic camera at a fantastic price), so we headed with cameras in hand to the Botanical Gardens at Golden Gate Park. I have never been there and the avid photographer in me, who loves photographing landscapes, places of interest, and flowers, has been wanting to make it there for quite some time.

I have to say, it was more than I expected. I got some really good pictures and had a great time with John.

He left to head to the gym and I came home for a bit. I actually tried to make plans to have *cough* company, but when I got home Josh was here so it would have been tough to have someone over. Not that Josh would have minded but it would have just been awkward. So I called the guy and asked if we could do it another time, and explained the situation. He ended up inviting me over to his house. We had fun, I put him in diapers, babied him, tied him up a bit, and really got off on being called Daddy. I mean I REALLY got off on it. I now know that I do have it in me and owe it to myself to explore it more. Its really weird how strong my Daddy side has been on.

With that, I changed my recon profile from 80 passive/20 agressive to 60/40. I ended up chatting with a hot guy who apparently is looking for a sub/top to explore some things with. He feels more comfortable with other subs and wants more of an alpha to explore with. To take it one step further, he's hot, knows a good friend of mine (who gives him high regards), and wants to come visit. Im all for that and spending some time as the Sir. hmmm... my own collared boy. WOOF

Anyway, thats been my day. Ill be heading out tonight for a few drinks at the Powerhouse. Its been a while since Ive been there.

Posted by Des at 08:49 PM | Comments (0)

February 26, 2007

Weekend Update

So my weekend update

Friday-Work announced that they changed their mind and wanted to give their employees a step above what the law now allows, and instead of 1 PTO hour for every 30 hours worked, they will give us 1 PTO hour for every 20 hours worked. The other job that I had 2 great phone interviews for, although they both liked me, decided they needed someone with more healthcare management experience for opening a new office in SF. I can understand it since it would be the only office located in SF and the responsibility to get it up and running would be a huge amount of work. Either way, I feel like it was still a win situation with the extra time offered by my current job. I will stay where Im at for the time being and reconsider changing jobs again after my vacation rolls around in May. If something else comes in between, I may look into it but for now Im happy with what I have.

Friday night I had patrol which was decent however Im beginning to realize that there are becoming too many people in charge. Ive been patrolling since December and there has been several new people who are apparently "on the board" who Ive never really seen or heard about since Ive been doing it. Either way, its a bit irritating to show up for a patrol and always feel like a "newbie" because someone new is "in charge". Im going to eventually give my feedback and request to be emailed on updates and changes to the patrol rather than having to show up and listen to all the new stuff in person.

Saturday-Brunch with some pups. It was a good time at Sparkys and there were 7 of us who showed up. Spike, Sukk, John, Kenji (now known as pumpkin pie), myself, and 2 guys I had never met before. Jodie and Bernard both seemed really nice. Saturday night I decided to head to powerhouse. There I ran into Ace and his friend Matt. The more I get to know Matt the more I realize he really is a nice guy and that my first impression (ok, my second and perhaps third), was not accurate. I also ran into John, Daddy Richard, and spunky, which I can only say, we made ourselves a good time (insert naughty stuff here).

Sunday morning was a bit of hell. I woke up, went outside to smoke, and had a hot ash fly in my eye. My reflexes froze and I let it sit there until I could actually catch a thought as to what was happening. I spent about 5 hours in extreme pain until John was nice enough to bring me some eye wash and some eye drops. After laying down many times, I was feeling ok enough to head to beer bust. I always enjoy hanging out with John.

When we got to beer bust, I noticed a really cute guy and we kind of did the head nod from afar to show acknoledgement. Several times through out the 2 hours there, we nodded, and waved a few times, until he actually came over and started talking to me. We were both pretty drunk but I do remember thinking that he was definitely hot. He kept telling me how hot I was and I wasnt sure how to respond. We ended up making out for quite some time and finally exchanged phone numbers before leaving. I need to call him today.

On another note, I wanted to rip a movie and its been a while since I had done it. I realized that Popcorn no longer worked since I upgraded from Panther to Tiger. Finally I upgraded to Popcorn and downloaded Mac The Ripper. After playing around with the settings on both, I can finally rip movies again. YAY!!!!!

Posted by Des at 06:56 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 16, 2007

Lots of Stuff

So the weekend was great. Saturday I decided to go to the Lonestar beer bust which I havent done in a long time. It must have been the day to do something different. I ran into two people that I absolutely think the world of. The 3 of us had talked about spending some time together in the past and today when they asked me to go back with them to the place they were house sitting, I said yes.

Normally my fears of straying from the norm, being away from my stuff, and being confined to a place where it wouldnt be so easy to get home, would have cause me to say no but for some reason, my inner voice said "take a chance" and so I did.

We stopped at Blockbuster, rented a couplpe of PS2 games, and went and had fun. We played Mortal Kombat which I havent played in ages, and I really enjoyed hanging out with them. Im really glad they invited me and Im really glad I said yes.

It seems however that any time I stray from the norm, there is a shift in balance in my life. Something always counter acts my shift and this time it was an email from Ste3ve who announced he found an apartment and was moving out. It wasnt exactly the best news, nor the way I would have liked to have been told (by email) but considering the relationship we've always had (non confrontational, non communicative) its the only way I would have expected it.

So now the search for a new roommate or to change our living situation. Josh and I have talked a little about what we would like to do but havent really come to any conclusions. To me, its pretty simple since we have several people interested in moving in and one that I presented would be a win for everyone or at least no different than what it is now. We will see what happens and Ill keep thinking of other options.

As for my feelings, I know its transition that Im afraid of, and that everything will work out fine in the end. I just have to muddle through the change. In my own experience change has always ended up better once its over.

So things have disappeared around the house and Im realizing things I need to start replacing. Its a good thing I have a little extra this month and that tax time is coming up soon. Things that I need to get are sofa, dishes, pots, pans, glasses, cutting knives, silverwear, a storage rack, and a garbage can. Seems like most other stuff are just things Id like to have. These will all come in time.

As for work, Elizabeth has been out on vacation still and Im realizing now why she doesnt take lunch. The scheduling to meet with patients doesnt seem to allow it because some days (like today), there are patients scheduled to be met with all day, practically every hour on the hour. Unlike me, she will just suck it up and not take her lunch. She is a work-a-holic and with that, also works overtime because she wants to get everything done. Because she does it all, they keep feeding her more and more and dont see that they are overworking her. I know all this now because Ive taken on a lot of her stuff and my work load has taken a hit. Ill be playing catch up on my stuff when she gets back.

A few quick mentions. Last week, I spent a little more time with throbbin and we watched The Devil Wears Prada. I enjoyed seeing it again especially after reading the book. I was right when I thought they had changed some things but were also surprised to find there was a scene that had about 20 pages wrapped up in one 10 second scene.

This Thursday, Big Gay Movie Night at Castro Theater. Im going with my friend Jason. $6 for Moulin Rouge and To Wong Foo. Friday is Patrol. Meeting on Saturday morning. Fun stuff Ahead!

Posted by Des at 05:02 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 22, 2006

Win A Trip to SF

For those who know me I used to work for headsets.com (1800Headsets.ca for the canadian market). The day I handed in my resignation was the same day the new catalog came out with myself being in the group photo. Last week, I received a holiday card at my new job and guess what? There is a group shot with me in the picture. It had my new employer wondering (and laughing).

With the holiday card, they are also offering a free trip to San Francisco. All someone has to do is be a bit creative and take a photo of someone wearing a headset in a creative way. Perhaps someone I know can enter and get a free trip, hotel paid, and travel expenses. Here's the card they sent. You should be able to click on the image to get the full size picture (you may have to click twice)

View image

Posted by Des at 06:24 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 17, 2006

Too Cute For Comfort

I guess although part of me knows I'm cute, there's another part that says I'm nothing special. Last night I kind of felt the two feeling at once.

I went out last night on my second patrol and when it was over I stopped for a few drinks. I got a lot of flirtatious looks which made me feel good but no one would approach me and actually have a conversation.

I also realized when I'm out by myself, a feeling of being inadequit in comparison to other people. Strangers so to speak.

After deciding to go to the Edge, I went over there without any expectations. I never thought of myself as unapproachable but am beginning to wonder what might send that signal to others.

I sat there in silence with more looking, flirting, and smiling. It wasn't until 2 guys on there way out stopped by and actually said hello before they left.

They told me how they all had been checking me out and none of them wanted to come talk to me. They decided on their way out they would at least say hi. It was then that I realized there is an intimidation with being cute. In many ways a curse.

Elizabeth and I have been reading The Devil Wears Prada and all I can hear in my head is "A million girls would kill to have your job". Its the same premise.

As for Elizabeth, whom I absolutely adore working with, she apparently talks highly of me. To her mom.

Her mom had put together a gift bag for me, gave it to Elizabeth, and made her put her name on it. I've only worked with her 2 months but apparently made a great impressipn on her and her mom (now known as mama Jean).

As for the rest of life, its been pretty hectic with lots of commitments and plans. I'm happy to be busy but I do need a rest. I'm really anxious for April and possibly heading home to visit. I'm really missing everyone back east.

*****

After I typed the last part from brunch at Crepevine via my treo, I had two cute guys calling me from the window of their car. I assumed I knew them but after shielding my eyes from the blinding sun and removing the ear buds from my ears, I realized I didn't. I assumed they were flirting but the only part I caught was "dont you remember us?" in a joking way which was a funny way of saying simply "hi".

chuckle......ok its fun being cute and I love cat calls.

Posted by Des at 02:03 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 02, 2006

Ruh Roh Rhaggy!

Tonight was my first patrol with Castro Community on Patrol. I was a bit scared at first, not knowing what to expect, and not knowing what kind of trouble we would find. Im really glad I hung out with John before because it made it much easier.

I started to get to know John a few months ago after the miniature golf outing with the pups and Ive really grown to like John a lot. We seem to have similar focus on life and as it turned out, he was in the same training for the patrol as I was.

So we hung out for about an hour before we had to start, talked about Heroes, what we anticipated would happen and for those who watch it, we wondered who the hero would be that dies. So many possibilities.

So we got there around 9:15 and were supposed to have an officer with us. This didnt happen. The 3 of us were on our own patroling the west side of Castro from Castro to Diamond and from Market to 19th. I really think because John and I knew each other, it really made it easy for Jamie to fall in with us and the 3 of us worked great as a team. We asked each other "what should we do?" questions and honestly listened to each other to come up with the best solutions. We all contributed to which direction we should go, what we should be doing, and at one point, should we call the non emergency number for the police.

We walked the beat, noticing many houses without porch lights or any significant lighting. We talked to many people around Castro, handed out whistles, and discussed what we were doing. We got a lot of great feedback and there seemed to be so many people who were happy we were there.

The only trouble we ran into (and it wasnt really trouble) was a group of under age kids, who were looking for a place to hang out, smoke pot, and drink on the streets. There were about 15 kids, who were settled on Collingwood, who apparently were already chased off Castro & Market, causing some trouble. At first we walked by, I said hello just to let them know we were around, watched them a bit as they went back and forth, up and down the street, and continued to drink and be disruptive in the neighborhood. Something I wouldnt want if I was living there.

So after some rough housing started, we decided it may be a good idea to call the police and have them take care of the situation. I remembered what it was like being that age and when I knew I was up to no good, it didnt matter who you were standing there watching, I still left because I was intimidated and didnt want to get in trouble. I completely forgot what it was like at that age until tonight. Even after Carlton the other night said to "remember, we were punk asses once". I never remembered until being on the other side of it all.

So we patroled till midnight and I went to Daddys for a drink. It was a great experience and I am really happy to be helping and to be a part of this group.

Oh yeah, apparently Im sexy in orange. Who knew? lol

Posted by Des at 01:48 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 27, 2006

Muni Loves You

Jason and I are heading to beer bust yesterday. We approach Van Ness Station as the voice announces in his asian accent "Next stop Van Ness Station. As always, thank you for riding muni". If the people werent already taken back by the polite, loving announcement on MUNI no less, we were taken back by the comment that followed. "and remember MUNI loves you".

nuff said......

I finally finished Wicked tonight. Im going to read the script for the musical and compare. From what Im hearing, its completely different.

Heroes? Once again, cant wait till next week and after that I think I may die before the new year and new episodes. Is there a Heroes anonymous group I can go to? I think Im a junkie.

As for Saturday night and Sunday, I had a great time. My first play party at the 15 Association turned out to reveal a lot about myself. Its funny how S&M scenes always bring out a lot of emotion for me. This time it was all positive. I learned about what I want from a relationship and from many relationships. I learned there are many people out there I want to spend time with, cuddle with, be intimate with, play with, love, and be loved by, who are all ok with me loving others. I think I need that in my life more than anything and I feel fortunate to have so many great people around me.

Thanks to all who are a part of my life. I appreciate and love you.

Finally with the party, I also volunteered to be a Christmas tree. What is a human Christmas tree you may ask. Here is how it was described in the email. "What is a living Christmas Tree? It’s a bondage extravaganza where people like you are tied up to look like a Christamas Tree. For example, we have green saran wrap to tie you up into a green tree like shape. Depending on your interests, we can decorate you with low heat Christmas tree lights, or if you’re really daring, temporary piercings and tree ornaments.". I dont think Ill go as far as the piercings. Less is more right? Dont get me wrong, Im looking foward to the fun of it.

Ok off to bed.

Posted by Des at 10:29 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 23, 2006

Nightmare Before Christmas & Testing

Friday was a long day but well worth it. I was up at 5:30 and to work at 8. I worked till 6pm and met up with Stephen around 6:40. We went back to my place so I could change out of my dress clothes and we were off to dinner at Blue.

I have to say I was a bit disappointed with the food this time however the service was good. We both ordered from the grill and I knew I should have stuck to dinner. The Monte Cristo there was just not what I had expected (too much bread and not enough meat and cheese), and Stephens burger wasn't up to par either. The conversation next to us was irritating as well. A younger guy talking about the people he knew who had money and how their parents bought their kids houses right next to each other. Apparently this made him important and he felt the need to let everyone else know how important he was. I've always said "if you have to tell people how important you are, you generally aren't that important to begin with".

So after dinner we had a few hours to kill before hitting the movie theater. We went for a drink at the Mens Room which I had never been before and then down to Marlenas where I always enjoy the atmosphere.

Around 11 we hit the Metreon to see the midnight showing of Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D. I think many people expected it to be completely different so that things fly out at you and you experience what was actually made for 3D. I think they did a great job reworking the 3D to give more of a live stage performance and go into the movie rather than out.

Finally home and asleep by 2am which made for a hard nights sleep and a great morning. Stephen and I met up with John and Nipper for breakfast. I ended up going with the two of them to various pet stores looking for squeeky toys. We finally found the perfect one and I'm now the proud owner of a blue, pacifier shaped squeeky.

Sunday was beer bust. I was expecting to see Daddy Tony and wanted to find out about getting tested. As fate would have it, I arrived early and they had the testing van there. Quick and simple I got tested and I am now confident enough to say I'm HIV negative. One question that popped in my head is "How do you express joy for being negative to someone who's positive, without making them feel like they are less of a person". I am relieved but still want people who are pos to know its ok with me.

So this weekend, Halloween parties, and Six Flags Frieght Fest. Good stuff and fun times ahead.

Posted by Des at 06:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 09, 2006

I dont remember this pic being taken

But I remember everything after including getting picked up by a cute guy on Muni while I was drunk.

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May 22, 2006

pups will be pups *woof*

For those who are not familiar with puppy play, there is a large group of people in this world who relate to being puppies or dogs. We identify being on all fours, having our heads scratched and being on a collar and leash. Yes, even eating from a dog bowl.

On Saturday I went to a dinner for Trainers/Masters and puppies. It was a great time and nice to be able to meet some of the other Masters and pups in SF. For those interested in seeing some of my pictures, you can find them here. Please note, if you dont want to see human puppies then you may want to pass.

As for other news, Im heading to Chicago this week for my first time and it will also be my first time at IML. This should be fun.

Posted by Des at 06:09 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

April 25, 2006

Sunday Fun

Sunday was a good day. I got the energy to go to the gym early enough where as I normally say "fuck it" if I haven't motivated myself by 11. I got left around 9:30 and was there until 11.

I did my normal speed walking on the treadmill, which didn't really seem to be doing much for me. I decided it was time to pick up the pace, so I spent 5 minutes on the treadmill jogging. For most this probably isn't the most drastic change in routine but for me, I don't run.

The last time I remember running was when I lived in Rochester. Josh had decided to start his morning jogs again and I thought it would be a good idea to join him. I nearly died. To this day I still joke about how he tried to kill me that day.

As I was in the gym, I got a call from my friend Matt who wanted to go to breakfast. I had also been waiting for my friends Brad and Steve to call since Steve was picking him up from the airport. I haven't seen Steve in about a month and Brad was flying in from NYC.

We all agreed it would be best to grab food together so we went to Bagdad Cafe. It was just what I needed after a workout.

When food was done, I went with Steve and Brad over to Mr S. Man I dream of winning the lottery. There are so many great toys there and I want em all.

Finally we went to beer bust. It was quite busy since it wasn't raining and I did a great job at getting sauce all over my shirt. Matt showed up and fixed that by taking my shirt off.

Rick got drunk and was all smiles as only he and Margaret Cho can do. Matt drank water and watched me turn into the mess I was, Steve and Brad paced themselves enjoying the sights, and Ben finally showed up to see me in the drunk state of a normal Sunday at the Eagle.

I finally got the nerve to talk to this guy Daniel who I've been wanting to say hi to for a while. I've always been shy so it’s always been a quick how are ya.

Will showed up and told me he thought I was cute. I was floored again since he is VERY hot. I wanted to find out more about him since I heard he had a boyfriend, but didn't get the chance.

Finally the afternoon was through and on my merry way. Matt and I stopped by the Hole In The Wall for a quickie and I once again played the part of the drunken guy on Muni.

I got home and went straight to bed.

Posted by Des at 11:41 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

April 23, 2006

A Trip to the ER

I just took my first trip to an SF hospital this evening. A friend of mine got himself into a bit of trouble and another friend asked me to come with them to the hospital. I won't sum up the details however the emergency room has been interesting.

First an Asian woman needing an interpreter decided to cause a scene. Security had to come over just to get her to move away from the window where she was arguing with the admissions clerk. The show begins.

After waiting a bit longer, Security comes over again. This time, not for the same woman who I noticed went back to the window to argue, but for a different woman sitting at the window with a knife. They took it from her and suggested the psych emergency room.

I keep looking at a woman who has been sitting here a while. She is an Asian woman who does not speak English. She keeps looking at me with a devilish look. She hates me for some reason, which will go unspoken (at least in English).

A man to my right is on his cell phone telling a faceless person to "saddle up and come down here". He's got his socks and shoes off and telling the person how bad it is.

A man asks me for a quarter. A woman is outside asking for a cigarette.

The highlight you wonder? A lot of cute cops in uniform.

So much for the guy from NYC I met within 5 minutes of being at the Lone Star. I don't think I've ever clicked so quickly with someone and just as quick as we met, I had to leave. Hopefully I will see him at beer bust tomorrow.

Posted by Des at 07:12 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

March 20, 2006

Photos

Friday night I met up with a guy from Binghamton NY who I seem to have a few things in common. He seems nice and it seems like we have a few things in common. Hopefully with his busy schedule, we will hang out again soon.

Saturday I went to the gym to work out by myself. Mind you this was my first time going alone. It was a bit difficult but I figure I have to get over that fear. It brings me right back to high school gym class. The changing in the locker rooms and stretching and all that stuff. Either way, it was good to do it even if it wasnt that much of a workout.

Saturday afternoon I finally met up with a guy that Josh met through work. We both seem to enjoy photography and there was an Anti War Rally going on down at Civic Center. It was cool to have someone to shoot with and I hope we get to do it again. I really had fun.

Sunday = The usual. Beer Bust at The Eagle....

Finally some pics of Matt and Steve from the St Pattys Day parade. Isnt Matt cute with his hat?

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December 21, 2005

Hell Would Be Warmer

So the flight to Buffalo went great. I can probably chalk it up for the easiest travels I have ever done.

We left the apartment on time. I felt a bit bad for Josh because he stayed up all night packing. Either way, everything seemed to get done and a big thank you to Steve for taking us to the airport.

So the flight was on time, there was no trouble shipping the wine or luggage. About the only trouble I had was that my bag was 4 pounds over weight and I had to make some minor adjusting in order to avoid a $25 charge.

So besides that, everything went smooth. The plane was on time, the guy next to us kept to his own space, the connecting flight to buffalo was on 2 gates down, the woman on the connecting flight was pleasant and tiny and kept to her own space, and we finally landed in Buffalo on time as well.

We were expecting a snow storm or something which would ruin our first travel experience together. The weather was clear and the car rental went through without a hitch.

So this is the first time traveling with anyone. Josh and I have traveled in the past to the same destinations however it was always on different airlines, to different cities, only to arrive at different times. It was really nice to have someone familiar with me sitting next to me.

So we made it in to Rochester around 6:45. Josh's first task was to gain a heavy coat from his ex in order to keep warm. I have to say it didnt feel all too cold that night and actually seemed quite managebale as far as temps go.

It was nice to see Kym, Stan, Reid, and Patrick. Its been too long. I could tell by Kyms hug, that many of our old demons were gone and things really felt good. It felt like it did about 3 1/2 years ago before the messy dating experience I had with the psycho. Yes St3eve the psycho does have a name however I choose to refer to him as "the psycho" lol.

So off to Chris and Brians Christmas party around 8pm. It was fantastic. The first people we saw who must have been right on time, we Steve and Mark. Steve had a fantastic green shirt and he looked great. They both looked amazing and it was so nice to see familiar faces and good friends.

Kym was supposed to go but wasnt feeling well. She said she wanted to rest and pointed out the fact that I would be up and moving around, talking to EVERYONE, and that she wouldnt get her quality time in with me. I told her how wrong she was and how much I had changed. Needless to say, she was right.

I found myself waving at everyone who came up the stairs and floating around and being social. I saw many people I hadnt seen in over a year and perhaps 2 years. I actually knew most people there and have to say it was nice being at a party for a change and knowing people, not to mention having good, close friends there as well. It was like being with my family once again.

With all that said, the food was amazing. A table decked out with all these delicious treats, fountains of chocalate and if I didnt have *any* control, I could have been eating all evening. Luckily I do have some self control and only stuffed myself with about 2 plates.

Around 10:30pm we were off to bar night. For those who dont know what bar night is, its usually a theme night that is hosted by the Rochester Rams who happen to be the major leather group in Rochester. They raise money for many charities and do a lot of great things for the community.

Barnight wasnt as busy as they were in the past but it was nice to have room to move and talk to people. Josh and I did our own thing and it really felt good being home again. It was kind of odd for me, remembering the last time we were there and the feeling of needing to be seen together. It wasnt like that this time. Although we were in the same bar, it felt ok to be doing our own things. To be talking to everyone seperately and on occassion together. It felt really comfortable having a bf who I could do that with. It was amazing how things felt better.

So drunk Saturday, and Sunday to my dads. This was interesting. I just dont understand much on how they think or how they see the world. It was really nice seeing everyone, however I would have hope my cousin Paul would have been there.

Josh was at the table getting some work done on his laptop. My first thought was wondering if he would put that away and join the conversation. When he finally did, I had to think, could he get his laptop out and work again.

The reason being is my family is stubborn. They dont always see things the way I do and when we got on the topic of Laws forbidding smoking in a house where there are children, it was like going up against an army of smokers who are opposed to the government telling them what they could do in their own home.

They didnt see Josh's point, that a poor child, who has no control over what their parents are doing, are being hurt by the smoke, and being forced to inhale second hand smoke. What gives anyone the right to hurt their child? This is where Im ok that the government can create a law that says you cant.

We finally thought about it and realized why there was a disagreement. Its the fact that no one wants to admit they are or have hurt their child in any way. Who wants to be the one saying Ive harmed them. Instead, they will debate a point that everyone really knows isnt the truth. It could also be a little about selfishness an d the fact they want to smoke in their house, therefore have to figure out why its ok for them to do that. Really, Im ok either way, but do know its definitely harmful to the children, even if they do say it doesnt hurt them.

So Sunday night I went out with Jarrod and got to meet his bf of a year now. Chris5 and I hung out for a while as well and we all played darts together. Geoff was there as well and the 5 of us had a good time together despite how quiet it was out at the bars.

We first stopped by Tara where I got to see David, Bernie, Tony, John, and many many others that I really like. Then to the Forum where Terry served us drinks and got me on my way to tipsy. Finally ending at the pub, it was time to go back and crash.

Monday was the best. Spending the morning with Kym and going to see Rent. We stopped at Gitsi's for lunch before hand, and I got a Gitsi plate. It was fantastic. Cheeseburgers with hot sauce and meat sauce, topped over mac salad and homefries. Grease and more grease, tasted fantastic. You cant get this kind of food in SF.

When we finished we were off to the movies. When she asked me if I brought tissues, my response was "I dont cry anymore". About 10 minutes into the movie I was balling. It was sad. I knew that AIDS was part of the story but didnt realize the play was about that topic.

Monday night Josh and I met up with Nadine and AMY from Blue Cross and Jeffy who was at the party Saturday but didnt really have a chance to hang out with. I forgot how funny they all could be and we laughed for a good hour or two at Nasty D's. Josh left to go see Bruce again and I hung out with them. Now the cold was kicking in more and I finaly felt the temperature and was freezing more than I ever remember. I couldnt feel my ears and in that moment wished for San Francisco again. I can do this. I can get through the week.

When we were done, they dropped me off at the Avenue Pub. Marc came home to visit and everyone met me there. Things just seemed better with Marc like they did with Kym and I was really happy to be hanging out just like old times. There seems to have been a lot of healing that I never realized was happening until now. Things seemed like old times.

Tuesday morning came and we were both up early to head to my sisters. we stopped at a favorite restaurant of ours called First Taste for breakfast and then after headed out for what should have been a 4 1/2 hour drive up to my sisters in snow country.

The drive was great until we hit Pulaski. From there on out it was going to be down hill the rest of the way. We finally arrived here after about 6 hours driving through snow and more snow. There were white outs at times and we could barely tell where we were on the roads. I remembered how scary that feeling of being able to slide and hit something and not have control over the vehicle. I remembered even more why I live in San Francisco.

Josh and I determined it should be against the law to live in upstate NY. I mean, it is a health hazzard to kids right? lol....

Josh did an amazing job driving and Im hoping I didnt drive him crazy with my usual back seat driving. We made it here safely but can say, I will never be driving here in December (or winter) ever again in my life.

Last night we opened a few gifts from my mom, my sister, larry, and the kids. It really felt like family and it was really nice being here. Seeing my family has been great for me.

Im up early blogging and having coffee. Its -16 degrees outside and Im grateful Im warm. Its quiet and relaxing with everyone sleeping and being able to get my thoughts down here. Its great being able to catch a quick breath before the rest of the journey.

Tomorrow we head back to Rochester and Saturday we will be back in SF. Im excited to have this time together but very excited to be in warmer temperatures.

Posted by Des at 03:31 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 21, 2005

Potter

Weekend was good. A bit tiring but good.

Friday night we went to see Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire. Now for those who have read the book, I really think you will be disappointed. Id love to hear reasons if you are not.

Seems to me, they cut out a lot of important story factors. I was expecting house elves and got nothing. I was expecting to see Doby and got nothing. I was looking forward to the story of Hagrid finally finding someone else who was half giant and got a tame flirtatious romanace between two big people. Not half giants, no shame in being mixed, but just a condensed version of what should have been and could have been more interesting.

Rita Skeeters character wasnt half as annoying as in the book. The book dealt more with her tabloid writings and underhanded style of getting the story. "how does she know this stuff" and "she is totally writing out of context".

Some other stuff that was cut was much of the Quitich World Cup. Now this I was looking forward to seeing because when reading about it, it seemed like they had opportunities to make this into a completely magical event. Lots of glitter, gold, spells, magic.

So it really left me feeling empty and after being awake for 21 hours straight just to see it, it really didnt seem worth it to me.

Saturday I am sworn to secrecy. Apparently what Josh and I were doing is destined to remain a secret (at least till christmas). I can say we had a great time.

Sunday was beer bust. Josh started getting sick this weekend and it continued through Sunday. He ended up going to Barrys and ended up crashing there. I had a great time at beer bust and met some new people. I did leave earlier than normal though and figured Id leave on a good note. Sometimes when you are having a good time, its better to leave early and just chalk it up as a fun day. I ended up stopping at the Edge for what was intended as one more before heading home. I ran into my friend Allan who I havent seen in a while. For some weird reason I was popular with people and it really makes me wonder why some days no one talks to me and on other days everyone wants to. Its really odd.

So today was work again. I was hesitant about calling in but figured I have Thursday off and in 3 1/2 weeks Im heading to Rochester for a week. I havent called in since Ive been there and I almost feel guilty if I do. They have been giving me fantastic praise there on my work ethics that to disappoint them almost feels like I would be ruining everything. To give an example, today I got an email from the CEO. He received an email from my new lead who was praising me and telling him how great it was having me in the group.

With that, the CEO emailed me in response to his email and praised me himself. It was nice to hear good stuff. He also told Josh and I to go out and have dinner over the Thanksgiving holiday and bring him the receipt. Its weird to hear nice things and actually be rewarded for it.

On that note, it brings my entry to a close. Tomorrows another day.

Posted by Des at 06:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 17, 2005

Busy are the days

Ok, so I havent written in a while. Sue me! *smile*

This was a really busy weekend of picture taking and fun.

Friday night I actually left SF and went to a party in the east bay. I figured I should start hanging out with people if I wish to make some friends, so off I went to a place called Fruitvale and home I came around 4:30am.

I was originally planning on leaving early and being home around 1am however when it got close to 11pm I didnt want to leave so quickly since everyone else was staying. A guy I had met, and someone who apparently everyone else wanted me to meet, said he'd give me a ride back to the city. He only lives a few blocks away. Finally around 4am, he was ready to go. I didnt mind too much about getting home so late. It was a good time and well worth the venture.

Saturday we went to the conservatory at Golden Gate Park. Josh wanted to see the Natures Pharmacy exhibit and I wanted to take pictures. The conservatory is great experience for photography and I got a chance to use my super macro again which I love. Josh wasnt too happy with the exhibit but for me I just love the conservatory so I think with everything it was a wash. Its the second time there and we both agreed this time that the one in Highland Park in Rochester is still a bit better.

Saturday we started the day with lunch at Starbucks. My boss gave me a $25 gift card for Starbucks out of the blue and I figured it was a great time to use it. We had sandwhiches, coffee, and desert and still had some remaining on the card.

Now off to Berkeley to pick up our friend Matt and head to Six Flags Marine World. I was excited since I love amusement parks and havent been there since last summer on my birthday. I bought a season pass for 2006 and with it, I got in for free to this years fright fest. It also came with a coupon for a guest and all for a low low price of $55.

I wasnt going to bring my camera with me but glad I did. I think I captured some of the best photos Ive ever taken. Mixed in a bunch of so-so pictures are several great pictures of butterflies which were done using the regular macros feature on my camera. Ive been doing a lot with the super macros lately but this was the first time using the regular macros and what a difference it makes.

Another set of pictures that I was pretty proud of, are the time exposure shots. This was the first opportunity, being around lights when its dark, that I had to use this feature that Ive been wanting to play with for a while. It was worth the wait since I think I captured some great photos including one that reminded me of a kalidescope.

Finally home around 10pm and exhausted from the weekend. Work came too early this morning but I survived. I think I slept through most of the phone calls today and its a good thing I can do the job in my sleep. Apparently its true since I felt tired, withdrawn, yet still seemed to make people happy. Go me.....

And how was your weekend????

Posted by Des at 05:45 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 03, 2005

Another Exhausting Weekend But Fun

Friday night was good. Josh and I decided to head out for dinner. I knew a place off Divisidero on California and we decided to hop the 24 bus down there for grub. It was a decent place that we have ordered from before at work and I wanted Josh to try it since they had a lot stuff on the menu I thought he would like. It was good but for some reason I think its better when delivered. Guess I dont expect too much with delivered lunch as opposed to going some place for dinner.

I was going to go out but instead I was enjoying the togetherness that Josh and I were having. It just seemed like a night to stay in. We came home and watched a movie which wasnt really the greatest. It was Hide and Seek with Robert Dinero and it would have been better unseen. At least that was my opinion and Im sure it was close to others opinions as well. It didnt really matter much to me. Spending some quality time together was worth more than any movie.

Saturday started out early. Steve came along with us after we all had brunch at Chow. I have to say, I love their brunch, and we all decided their french toast is one of the best ever.

We started out at Urban Outfitters where Steve needed to exchange something. Steve and I agreed how we hate taking stuff back unless we have to. Josh is just the opposite and has absolutely no problem returning stuff he doesnt want.

From there it was off to Ross and Marshalls. I was hoping to find shoes or sneakers but Ross didnt have a great selection and Marshalls shoes were put away awaiting a new and improved shoe department.

We then went to Loehmans and finally FCUK. Not much there and FCUK was out of size small in the sweater Josh was hoping to buy. After debating just how to work it, he finally had them call the LA store who will be sending it right to the house. He should have it this week.

Several outfits and utter exhaustipon, it was time to go home. It was fun spending money and shopping especially when work is footing my bill.

Saturday night we hung out with Rob and Rick over at their place. It was kind of nice hanging out with another couple for a change.

Along with hanging out with Rob and Rick, I received a call from my friend Marc. He was a bit drunk and in Philadelphia on a layover. He was calling to tell me about a guy he saw in a bar there who was from Rochester, but couldnt remember his name. Its funny how it works and as it turned out I did know the guy and remembered him. After catching up a bit, he did mention that he was almost definitely getting laid off from the airline again and was considering moving to SF. It would be cool to have someone else I know living here in the city.

After several UV's and Iced Tea's I was ready for bed. Home and to sleep for us.

Several things happened on Sunday. First, I called my friend Rachel in Ohio who I havent really talked to in a few years. It was great catching up with her. Sometimes as life goes on, people who were close to you at one time, start living their lives as you are living your own and you kind of lose touch. Its always nice when you can reconnect and catch up. Its nice to know friendships are strong enough to handle the distance between us and still be as strong as they once were.

Sunday was also Castro Street Fair. It was a good time. We started with a gay.com brunch which included several people that Josh and I knew from online and there turned out to be about 20 people all together. We went to chow once more.

After brunch it was off to the fair, where Josh handed out some hand outs on the corner, which was a first time for him. It was nice to see how many people were taking the hand outs and nice to see him working hard to get things going. Hopefully the turn out will be successful and he will get a few more clients out of it.

After walking around for a little while (once he was done), we parted. Josh had plans to meet his friend Barry in Berkeley and I was going to meet Jay. Well needless to say, I hung out by myself for about an hour and started drinking before Jay showed up. I got to meet the guy he started seeing, who is really a nice guy. Cute too. He really needs to have a nice guy in his life and hopefully it will be something that lasts a while. His friend Diane, who had moved here from Rochester just this week, was with us and the 4 of us hung out for a bit.

Again drunk and exhausted from the sun, the walking, and the booze, I came home and went to bed.

It was a great weekend.

Posted by Des at 08:19 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 26, 2005

Folsom Street Fair

I left the apartment around 10:30, stopped at Posh to grab a bagel and was off to the fair. I arrived just after 11 and it gave me some time to walk around before heading over to Mark's. The fair was pretty empty which was good. I got to briefly look at some of the booths set up and take a few pictures without anyone getting in the way.

Around 11:50, I headed over to Marks. I had volunteered to work for 2 hours helping out with his annual photography shoot. Apparently he's been photographing the leather scene in SF since the 70's. I was kind of excited about helping yet a bit scared since I didnt know what he wanted me to do.

I arrived and Mark was out with 2 others putting up posters and getting the final touches on before opening the door. Finally he told me he wanted to put me outside and attract people. I was shocked and complimented at the same time. Me as bait? Weird... Ive never thought of myself as bait material but it was nice to be "that" guy.

The bonus was, I got to stand in the stairwell right on the fair and watch the crowd from a slight advantage above everyone. People seem to flirt more knowing you are a part of something.

I did manage to see a few new fetishes that I had never seen before. Well Ive heard of pony play but never imagined they made such gear for it. Pony play has always been known as a straight fetish and it help true. There were women with bits in their mouths and actual hoof's. The hoof's even galloped when they walked. They looked to be made of plastic and we're like heels that their feet went in. It was very amusing.

Finally my time there ended. I walked briefly waiting for some people I knew to show up. I walked around and ran into Steve and Eric and walked with them a bit. Ian showed up and I hung out with him and finally Josh got there a little after 3. Jay showed up a bit later and now there was 6 of us walking around. Around 4pm most of us were tired of the fair and headed over to the Eagle for a few drinks. Not as much fun but fun to people watch. I realized just because youre cute, doesnt mean you have a personality. One cute guy with a cute puppy tail coming out of his jeans, stood in front of us. After watching guys fawn over him and his tail, and listening to him talk to others, I realized a) he was really drunk and b) Im so glad Im not him as cute as he is.

Finally I headed home around 6. The walk back to Muni was interesting. I ran into a guy who was pissing on a car. Decked out in leather and nearly falling over. I talked to him a bit and he started walking with me. Drunk and obnoxious in ways, he told me how his partner is closeted and ditched him. He was off to go find him but really wanted to go home. He had a bit too much fair.

Finally to the muni and just as I get on, This young cute guy (again drunk go figure) slams into the back of me. Proceeds to tell me how cute I am, try to kiss me, then starts feeling and groping not only myself but everyone on the train. This ended up escalating to him trying to grab asses, pinch nipples, and annoy everyone around. He slapped a straight girls ass and her boyfriend looked like he wanted to hit him.

Thankfully my camera was in hand because I got a picture of both guys on the way home. The drunk guy pissing and the drunk boy on Muni (He's the one on the right).

Finally home, relaxing, and in bed early. I need rest.

The rest of the pictures for the Love Parade and Folsom are posted. Next weekend Castro Street Fair.

Posted by Des at 05:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 17, 2005

The Other Side of It

So the other side to the last post, is have you ever looked at someone who was drop dead gorgeous and said "He's really good looking but I could never date him because he's way too gay".

Its been a busy week for me, some ups and some downs. It seems I got a raise at work and they were very nice in giving it to me. They simply called me into the office and said "we want to give you more money". I said *sigh... ok".

I got my money from the DVD and went out and bought my leather vest. Its a bar vest and I have to admit, it looks great on me :)

I cant wait to wear it in.

Other things at work, they have been piling on more work these days and I feel like Im treading water to keep up. One of my biggest issues is saying "I cant get that done". To me I should be able to do everything they put on my desk. Unfortunately Im one person and there has to be a line.

One of the reasons is that the one person I do back up for when she is out, has been out most of the week. Not sure really if she will be back. I hope so but you can never really tell here. Its like some weird horror movie where people just disappear and everyone goes about as if they were never there. They are in fear because of camera and people may be watching if they say anything. Actually there was an episode this last season of Smallville that was similar. Anyway, its kind of freaky how people just disappear.

With that, one of my new roles is back up for Live Person. I never thought I would be afraid of chat and instant messaging before but its kind of tough keeping up with 8 chats and entering in orders as well as researching stuff all at once. I give the full time Live Person chatters lots of credit. Its a lot harder than the phones.

Finally we had a record week at work. Its amazing. We had a million dollar week. Last time we had a record week, we got $150 worth of new clothes. Im hoping that we will still get something since this was a true record and breaking the million dollar mark is unreal for a week. We all celebrated with a bit of champaigne at the end of the day yesterday.

Thats about it and up to date thus far. Hopefully things will continue on an upscale for the next few weeks. Next weekend will be a lot of picture taking. The Love Parade on Saturday and Folsom Street Fair on Sunday. Ill be sure to share the pics :)

Posted by Des at 05:25 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 27, 2005

Feeling Down

Have you ever had a day where it seems like everyone is too busy to talk to you. Todays been one of those days for me. It seems like everyone I have called today was busy and couldnt talk, didnt answer, or there was just a huge lul in the conversation. Im beginning to take it personally. Of course I know its just an off day. Hopefully the evening will get better.

Posted by Des at 04:19 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 20, 2005

The Questions Answered from last weekend

So many have asked "what happened?""Did you find out?"

I guess I never updated here for those who read my blog.

I did find out what happened last Saturday night and its not as bad as I had thought.

I had apparently taken my clothes off in hopes of persuading others to do the same. They didnt!

I then passed out and Josh came to bed soon after. While I lay motionless, he had one of our friends enter our room asking for a condom. Well he got up and got out his toybox (thats where the condoms and lube were), and gave them to the other 2 so they could play.

So Im happy for them, happy that it wasnt something I should have remembered, but sad that no one got naked for pictures.

Hope that sums it up for everyone :)

Posted by Des at 11:23 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The Questions Answered from last weekend

So many have asked "what happened?""Did you find out?"

I guess I never updated here for those who read my blog.

I did find out what happened last Saturday night and its not as bad as I had thought.

I had apparently taken my clothes off in hopes of persuading others to do the same. They didnt!

I then passed out and Josh came to bed soon after. While I lay motionless, he had one of our friends enter our room asking for a condom. Well he got up and got out his toybox (thats where the condoms and lube were), and gave them to the other 2 so they could play.

So Im happy for them, happy that it wasnt something I should have remembered, but sad that no one got naked for pictures.

Hope that sums it up for everyone :)

Posted by Des at 11:23 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 15, 2005

Pictures

Mark Chester Photo's from Dore Alley Fair

Posted by Des at 05:14 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 14, 2005

Formula For Disaster

Baseball Game + Sun = heat exhaustion + cosmo's = disaster

So the game was kind of boring. Only 8 hits after the 5th inning closed. No runs as of yet. The 6th inning the Twins scored 2 runs and in the bottom of the 6th the A's scored 4. We left at that time for two reasons. 1. It was boring and 2. the sun was getting to me.

After getting the alcohol needed for the evening (citron, tropical blue pucker) the party was ready to start. It was nice to see everyone who came over and we all seemed to have a great time. Ken, Matt, Drew, Matt (the other Matt), Jay, Rick, Rob, Rick (the other Rick), and the 3 of us made for a great time. The problem is, I dont remember the ending.

Waking up this morning, I found that I had spilled a drink in the guest room, and broke a martini glass. Josh was nice enough to clean it up. I dont remember any of that. Then I find out that my pants and shirt were in the guest bedroom as well. Finally I went in there to find Josh's toy box out, condoms on the desk, and lube. Hmmmmm..... I dont remember that part either and being that Josh is in training today, I have to wait till he gets home to find out the answers.

Did I have sex? with who? Did I just take my clothes off in there and Josh had sex? Did someone else other than the two of us have sex? Things just dont make sense today.

So now Im hurting. My head is still pounding and I slept in until 11:15. For those who know me, Im usually up at the crack of dawn.

Those questions and more to be answered on the next episode of SOAP.

By the way, happy birthday to me today. I got a voice mail from my sister and my mom singing happy birthday, and a call from the CEO at work to wish me the same. The second one was just weird to me but nice. I dont think Ive ever had anyone from any job call me to wish me a happy birthday before.

Jay gave me a plant (a small tree actually) since apparently I took good care of his while he was away. Also everyone has said we need more plants. I still stand by the fact that I cant even keep a cactus alive. He also gave me three photos that he had taken at Dore Alley this year. Pictures!!!! Someone actually gave me pictures. This was a fantastic gift and something I would give someone else. For those of you who may get me something in the future, make note. I love getting photos....

So beer bust today? still not sure yet. Guess I should figure it out soon.

Posted by Des at 02:32 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

July 30, 2005

Pictures

So Ive been playing more and more with the macro feature on my camera. The new background is a photo I took in Mill Valley. I would love to hear some feed back on how it works against the text.

Also if you are interested, there are some pictures from my sisters day 1 and day 2 for your viewing pleasure.

Posted by Des at 09:09 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

July 18, 2005

Everything is beautiful......

Ok, so Ive been slacking in the journal department once again. Seems like I cant find the time to write, however things are slowing down a bit and this weekend was just what the doctor ordered.

After several months of chaos with job hunting, apartment hunting, starting my new job, and moving, things are finally at the end of the transition period. This weekend there were several things around the apartment that I wanted to get done but I just didnt see a need to do them. There was no priority there and no necessity which was kind of nice. Josh and I were able to have a great weekend together without any stress on what needed to get done.

Steve is in Disney Land (lucky dog) celebrating his 40th birthday which was the other day. Although he is missed, it was kind of nice to have the place to ourselves. I cooked on Friday night and Saturday night and it was nice to be able to sit outside on the deck and enjoy the view, while being secluded on top of the hill.

I also started in the planning process of dinners so Josh doesnt have to do it all the time. He's been doing the planning and the cooking for the past few months and has made note that he has grown tired of it. I figured Id give him a break and take on some of that responsibility since he's now been getting more interviews, working at the space with clients, and taking a few odd jobs to help make some cash.

So the weekend was fun. I got an email from my friend Nadine who I have to admit, educated me about milking. Milking apparently is used in forced chastity and being brought to climax so that the penis ejects the semen, without an orgasm. Who knew? Im thinking I should have known being a male. It was quite interesting to hear that she learned what a bear however related bears to furrys. I corrected her on that.

Speaking of bears, it was also lazy bear weekend in Guernville this past weekend. We didnt go but it would have been nice. I know several people who did and Im sure it was a good time. One year we will make it up there.

So Friday night I went out and had fun. Saturday we went to Marin to go visit Josh's friends. It was a bit odd being there again since the last time I was there was before his friends Josh C and Bruce broke up. Now we are going there to visit Josh C who is house sitting for his ex, and his new boyfriend is staying there as well.

Dinner was nice, however I grew tired quickly so we left around 10:30pm. Home to bed and ending the day.

Sunday we had pancakes again (I also made pancakes Saturday morning). Whole wheat pancakes (I think) and they were delicious. Im finally finding whole foods that I enjoy so hopefully in the future it wont be as much of an issue between what we eat. I also did the planning for dinners for 4 nights and Josh and I went shopping at Rainbow. We actually had a good time shopping together and I think it has to do with the fact, I knew what we were getting because I made the menu. I usually feel left out, blind, and just wanting to get it over with asap.

Sunday was also beer bust. After going over to water plants at my friend Jays apartment (he is out of town), I headed off to beer bust at the Eagle. There I met some great guys (all who have bf's), watched one of them get a blow job while we talked, and saw a bunch of people there dressed as clowns. Ive heard about clown sex before but it was defintely a first for me to see it. Ok so there wasnt really any sex there but there was clowns making out with each other and to see that alone I thought "this may just be the closest thing Ill see to clown sex".

So thats about all with the exception of Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince arriving at my door on Saturday. Ive only read the first three chapters but already Im really into it. Seems like there is going to be a lot of action in this one. Darker than the previous ones, and hopefully more on the edge since they are now getting older.

Oh yeah, finally found a bluetooth headset that I absolutely love and works well with my treo 650. Hooray!!!!!

My best to all

Posted by Des at 04:51 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

July 02, 2005

Moving Day 1

So last night was fun. I went out to the Pilsner and ran into some people I knew. I was feeling like I needed a bit of alone time, so I went out by myself. I ended up running into a few people I knew and had a great time.

Got home about 12:30 and ready to get up early to start moving. This morning started slower than I had hoped. I was always used to moving day meaning we got up early and busted our ass all day. This wasnt the way it worked today.

I got up early and waited for Josh and Steve to wake up. They showered, and we went for breakfast around 11am. We went to Bagdad Cafe which I always enjoy and finally after a few errands, made it back to the Market St apartment around 1. By the time we brought the first load of stuff over, it was around 2 and by the time we decided we were done for the day, it was around 6.

We moved most of the stuff to the Saturn St apartment but there is still a ton of stuff left to move. We will take care of that stuff tomorrow before beer bust and hopefully have Monday off to recover and organize everything.

I got a call from Jason today. Finally after a week and a half of phone tag (well me persistantly calling him), he called to tell me what I already expected. He isnt going to come to visit Tuesday as originally planned. Sucks that I went through all the trouble of figuring out the schedule, paying for the ticket, only to have him cancel at the last minute.

He's paying me back for the ticket however its still a bit depressing. In some ways its good though because even though I would have loved his company, the timing wasnt all there. I took off 2 days of work and with the 4th of July, it would have been 3 days without pay. Now at least Ill get to work 2 of the 3 days and it wont be so bad.

Along with that, it gives me a bit more of a chance to get the apartment together for when my sister comes at the end of the month. Hopefully she wont cancel lol....

So thats about it. In the new apartment and really enjoying it. Enjoying the space, enjoying the view, enjoying the washer and dryer (which Josh is enjoying as well). It really feels like a fresh start.

Posted by Des at 09:21 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 27, 2005

Pride Weekend

To start, the pink party was fantastic. Josh and St3ve went to a party which I decided at the last minute not to go to. Apparently I didnt really miss a whole lot but I was expecting people I know to be at the pink party right at 7 and the party they were going to was from 4-10pm.

As it turned out, no one I knew was getting there till after 8 so I headed out about 7:30ish. The place was mobbed with people. Swarming the gates, donating their $3, and socializing all down Castro, Market, and 18th Streets. I called ran into my friend Ken who was heading to a party at the Eagle but promised to be back later. His hair dyed a bright pink for the festivities and pride weekend.

After seeing him off on Muni, my friend Rick called to say he was on his way. After finally finding him, Josh & St3ve called (text messaged rather) saying they were on their way too. The party was a bit boring so they left early. The original people I wanted to meet up with (Jay, Joe, Mike, and Bill) werent around till later and after a game of phone tag, it was impossible to meet up with them. Fighting the crowd and finding a haven to meet was just not with us that day.

So Josh, Ste3ve and I hung out for a bit and ran into Eric who was at the Edge. He brought along his new found friend Michael from Sacramento who decided he enjoyed hanging out with us more than the friends he came with. From there we met up with our friend Dave as well as another friend of Erics named Corey. Now we have enough for a party.

Although we only visited Daddys and The Edge, we did have some fun and drinking in the streets. Lots of dancing and cocktails later, we ended up back at Edge where we hung out in the back. There was a group of people on their knees and a few people getting blow jobs in the corner. Happy Pride on that one lol.

So out late and up early, we were out of the house Sunday morning for the parade. Josh and I stopped for food at Posh Bagel and hopped on MUNI to Powell Street. We planted ourselves on the ledge to get a good view of the parade. Ben and Steve arrived shortly after with a friend of theirs names Matt. Steve and Eric arrived shortly after.

The parade was about 4 hours long (longer than last year) and was fantastic. I used up my 512MB SD card with pictures and video. The first time Ive filled the card since Ive had the camera.

We finally ran into Josh's friends Ari and Shera from NYC (hopefully spelled the name right) and when the parade was done we went for Thai food before heading to see the festivities at Civic Center. It was mobbed with people and after trying to figure out where we wanted to be, which stages to see, and find where we wanted to hang, we finally settled for dancing at the Radical Faeries area. We danced some more and had a blast. We ran into a couple of furrys there (one Josh knew and the other one I knew) and hung out till around 6. Ari and Shera went back to their hotel and finally we got a hold of Ste3ve and Eric after losing them along the way.

We were home by 6:30 and although I had original plans to go back out for a few, I collapsed from exhaustion at 6:30. I slept till 4am and after 9 1/2 hours sleep, I woke up feeling refreshed from rest. I guess I really needed the sleep.

So off to work this morning to meet with the CEO for our final day of training. Hopefully it will go well, and Im sure it will, but you never know. They have given me nothing but praise at work and Im really feeling good about the job.

Next week.... The Move!!!!!

Posted by Des at 05:36 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 25, 2005

Pride Begins

Last night I met up with some friends from Rochester who was visiting Jay who had moved here in December. It was nice seeing those guys and hanging out for a while at the Lone Star. For those of you who know me, I dont leave Castro often to go drinking and last weekends adventures to Polk Street and Stud were enough to last me a while.

The Lone Star was a bit crowded (I mean its a bear bar after all) and there were some hot guys there. I flirted with a few but mainly enjoyed hanging out with the crowd I was with. Jay offered to drive me home which I was a bit surprised. I mean it is San Francisco and easy to get around by MUNI. I accepted and it was home for me.

They came in and saw the apartment which they thought was nice. I guess Im just used to living here and cant become too attached to the place since we are moving in a week. I just remember the excitement when I was moving here and seeing the pictures of how great this place was (still is). Its a shame it isnt big enough to accomidate the 3 of us.

So today has been a busy day. Woke up, had coffee, and went down to Castro for food. The place was a bit busier for 10am but nothing intolorable.

I ate at Posh Bagel which resembles Brueggers in ways. I stopped at Cliffs to get a globe for the ceiling fan (it broke about a week ago). Who knew such a small hardware store carried all those things you would think would be impossible to find.

So back home to clean. The landlord wants to show the place tomorrow morning in hopes in renting the place asap after we move out.

After cleaning, a nap, and finally finishing one of the required books for work, Im out in Castro again for more food.

The place is hopping already with people getting a head start on the pink party. Its funny but last year I felt more energy about pride here, being it was new. This year it seems more of an inconvenience with lots of loud, obnoxious, gay men who have invaded my home. Guess I shouldnt see it that way but it does get irritating to listen to and I hate crowds.

So welcome to pride weekend. Pink party....oh boy!

Posted by Des at 06:43 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

May 30, 2005

Id like to say the apartment is final and we have jobs

But I cant.....

This week has been pretty good. I had two interviews and they both went well. The question now is do I want either of them. I realized, if I settle, I will be making much less money than I could. Is it worth it just to have a job? Im not sure it is, however it would be nice to have something permenent again.

With that Ive been looking into health insurance again. It seems to be the place to make the better bucks. Its been almost 2 months and Im finally feeling a bit refreshed from the last place. The negativity has finally settled and I think Im ready to persue it once again. Hopefully it will be better this time around.

As for the apartment, things are hanging by a thread. We dont know if its a yes or a no. Steve finally called the woman who is renting it out for her dad, and we are hoping they will give it to us based on his info. Its worked for the past year so I dont see why it wont work now.

The biggest problem we are having is that the woman wants to rent it to us, but her brother and father are the ones telling her no. Her brother who is a contractor and rents out apartments, doesnt like the looks of the applications (mainly mine and Josh's). He seems to be the one standing in our way. Her dad is 90 and I believe is listening to the sons warnings on this so if it was completely up to her, we would be moving soon. Guess we have to wait and see what happens and be prepared to hear no.

One good thing thats coming out of all this is that I finally got the chance to do some cleaning up on my credit report. I guess I was under the impression that I had bad credit and there really wasnt much I could do about it. After looking at my credit report, I realized its not really *that* bad and just needs some letters written, and I need to have some claims disputed. Once I get a couple of those things off there, it should improve considerably.

As for Josh, he is still looking and working on opening up his practice. At least getting established a bit more in the community. He made up gift certificates to raffle off for charity, and on Saturday we went to the really really free market, where he gave away free body work.

The really really free market is a place where you leave your business cards behind, bring items youre looking to get rid of, and kind of trade free for free.

I went with him mainly because he wasnt sure if anyone would want free chair massage. He wanted me to be a body in the chair just in case. Needless to say, he didnt have a free moment, so no body work for me. I was really happy though that it all worked out for him.

His first client was a 7 year old boy who came up and asked "whats that". Josh told him it was a chair for massage, and the boys response was "I want it!" lol.

When Josh told him he needed to get permission from his mother, he yelled across the park "Mom! he wants to talk to you". After his mom gave permission for the kid to get a massage, he must have gotten bored within a few minutes, and simply said "ok, Im done" and walked away.

After that, he had a line for most of 2 hours and gave massage one right after the other. He was even able to trade with a woman who Josh really enjoyed receiving from.

Nothing else really exciting happening these days. Sunday was the usual beer bust at the Eagle. The weathers been nice. Sunny and mid 60s which seems to be warmer than mid 60s used to feel. If I had to compare the temperature of SF this year as to that of Rochester I would say 65 in SF feels a lot like 75 in Rochester.

This week coming up? Nothing planned but working on the job issue. Ive got enough in savings to last me until mid September and still make the same amount I did when I was working. My planning worked out in that sense but theres so much more I could do with my savings. New camera, new furniture for the apartment (if or when we get it), Josh needs a massage table, and lots of other stuff.

On that note, Happy Memorial Day. Last year on Memorial Day, I was finishing up my packing of the apartment, cleaning it out, and leaving the place on Gregory Street for good. June 1st at 5am will be my anniversary of flying out to SF. Happy Anniversary to me :)

Posted by Des at 09:23 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

May 22, 2005

The Wedding & BBQ

Ill try and keep this one brief.

The wedding was nice. It was a bit different from the traditional wedding but the color scheme was red & black. The bridesmaids dresses looked as if they were from the Renaissance era. It was held in the park on a bright sunny day, and hamburgers and hotdogs were served shortly after the vows were said.

Josh looked great and did an awesome job of marrying the two of them. His signature is vital on the certificate which is kind of impressive in its own way.

I got to meet the photographer and learned a bit about her new camera . Lindsay had her take a couple of pictures of Josh and I which werent going in the final book. They turned out really nice and our favorite is the one below thats set back a bit and has less light. I want to get an 8X10 of it as soon as I get some other stuff out of the way.

So on to the BBQ. I had a lot of fun. I was a bit worried that I wouldnt fit in (as I always am when I am around Josh's friends) but for the first time I really felt a bit more comfortable. Im not sure why this time was different but for some reason it was. Lindsy, Katie, Suzanne, and the infamous Josh C were all there and in good spirits and really made me feel comfortable, accepted, and as if I was no longer an outsider.

We got to meet Will for the second time. We had originally met him at Josh C's graduation party last year but I didnt remember mainly because that day was a long day out in the sun at Marine World not to mention my birthday. We were exhausted by the time we got to the dinner.

Anyway, Will was really cool. Funny, cute, and very flirtatious. My kind of guy lol. For some reason I got the feeling Josh C was afraid I would take advantage while Will was drunk and some how I wanted to say "Thats more Josh than me". I guess they dont know me very well yet so I cant blame them for having that kind of understanding of our relationship or my manners.

Perhaps about 10 years ago when I was single, I would have had no problem being over a friends house and taking someone into a back room for a blow job or something but several things are different in this situation. First my bf is there and I would never do anything without asking him first. Second, I have a respect for someone elses home in which they have invited me into. And third, I dont take advantage of guys who have been drinking. Wow my morals have changed over the years.

So home we are and home we will be. Its Sunday morning and we need to fill out the applications for the apartment. Beer bust today YAY.... Now for the pics of Josh and I.

Thank you Lindsay & John for having the photographer take these pictures and many thanks to Beth Brandt for taking them and sending me the copies. They really came out nice.

Posted by Des at 06:18 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

May 08, 2005

Home Again - Civilization and Gay Life YAY!

So it was nice coming back to SF and having the feeling of being home again. Before making it back to the apartment, Josh needed to get the application in to the department of public health before they closed for the weekend.

He needed to do this asap so he can sign up for the test and get his license. He is hoping to start working at Kamala Spa and is right on top of getting it done. Im hoping it all works out for him. The spa is amazing and I can totally see him in that environment.

When I stopped by there to get a menu from him about a month ago, I was amazed. Its on the 7th floor right at Union Square. They have a huge aquarium next to a window that overlooks the square and Macys and all the high end stores. The clientel are much more upscale as well. I think Im as anxious as he is lol.

So with that, the DOPH wouldnt take cash. Money order or checks only. How weird. This was the first I realized I was back in SF. We went down to the post office to get a money order and while Josh was occupied at the counter this guy waves me over to talk to him.

I approach him after flirting a bit and he introduces himself. He asked "what are you up to?". Hmmm Im not familiar with that pick up line but none the less it was nice to be back in SF where the gay men flow freely and you can get picked up in the post office just as easy as a bar.

We made it back to the apartment around 5:15. We still havent unpacked the car completely yet (Its now Sunday morning). Steve had cooked dinner and we had bought a bottle of Champagne. It was a celebration of Josh being home, and a new life for the 3 of us living together.

Saturday it was nice to wake up in our bed, wish Josh laying next to me. There was a huge comfort in knowing he was back. A different feeling than when he would visit, knowing he would only have to leave again. This time he was here for good.

It was also nice to a) have coffee b) not have to go outside to use the bathroom and c) not have to climb that huge and exhausting hill to get something to eat. It felt good being home, our home.

So we went to check out apartments yesterday (actually I looked at one and let them look at the others). The one we went to was off Church St and had what we were looking for. It had 2 good size bedrooms, and huge room for an office, a fairly large living room, a full bath as well as a split bath, a back yard, and a kitchen that could accommodate a table for dinners. A couple of things didnt feel right about the place though. For one the layout was long and narrow. For some reason I dont like everything being off one hallway. The other was actually laying out $4900 just for a security deposit and thats not even the first or last months rent. It was also our first place we looked at so we are confident (I am at least) that there are other places out there.

It was nice being able to eat in the Castro again. We had lunch at a Mandarin Chinese Restaurant which was yummy.

Later in the evening we got a call from 3 of Josh's friends at Heartwood who were in his class but staying for the 4th quarter. They are currently on break for 2 weeks and decided after we left they were going on a road trip. Their first stop is San Francisco. YAY!!!!

I love Melissa, Steve, and Sarah. They were greatly accepting of me when I was up there visiting. Beautiful people and a lot of fun too. It was funny that I would be so excited to see them after only leaving them a day ago.

We went to Samovar for tea which turned out to be fantastic. After getting all caffined up, we came back to our place to let them crash on the floor of our living room. We watched the DVD I made which has slideshows from Heartwood as well as some video clips. It was my first attempt at using IDVD on my mac and I mastered it pretty quickly. There was only two real flaws in my creation. a) I forgot to put a button to return to the main menu from one of the links and b) forgot to fill in a picture for the menu portion.

I have to say, I was quite surprised at what this software could do. It really works and acts like a DVD and not only in a way that it plays in a DVD player but the set up on the screen allows options, graphics, and a actual tree of functions.

At the end of the evening I gave Josh his birthday present. Its a few days early but it just felt like a good time to do it. I got us Margaret Cho tickets in June.

I cant believe it. We are going with Steve, Calvin and Dave to go see Margaret Cho live. I have laughed histerically at her stand up for a few years now and with her being one of the biggest fag hags ever to live, and being in SF, it should be an amazing show.

Well that takes us to Sunday morning. Josh just woke up and it sounds like several of the others are now waking up as well. Beer bust today? hmmmmmm

Posted by Des at 08:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

May 07, 2005

Heartwood Graduation

Lets see. The best place to start would be graduation. Not only was I proud of Josh for graduating (He is now a certified massage therapist with 780 hours) but also for helping put together a fantastic graduation. From the dinner which consisted of delicious chicken and asparagus (everyone there was delighted to have chicken), right down to having a DJ, designing the programs (which I was proud he used one of my photos), and basically making it happen. Many people said it was the best graduation ever, which was nice to hear knowing how much work Josh had done to prepare.

I havent gotten a chance yet to post the pictures but they will be coming soon. So graduation was fun. His grandmother, Mark, and Barry made it there early in the afternoon and we all had lunch together. Josh finished up the programs while several friends of his decorated the Lodge and the Temple. I stayed in his room and got most of the packing done because he really didnt have the time.

He made it through his final class around 6pm and we met everyone at the lodge for graduation dinner. His grandmother was a bit funny when she saw the circle around the food in which they let out a loud oooooooooooooohm. When Mark asked her why she didnt participate, she flat out said "oh I dont believe in that". Yep, thats his grandmother lol.

Another funny quote I remember hearing her say, was when they let out an Aaaaaahhhhh at the ceramony. She turned to Josh and said "I hope your not into that". The woman is great and when she says this stuff, its like she doesnt expect and answer and she is just telling it like it is (to her belief of course).

So dancing to a DJ, African Drummers in the temple, and Karaoke. We danced at all 3 in different ways. The DJ was more house music and we strutted our stuff a bit. Even his grandmother got out there and danced. She had waited all evening "to see some dancing" and finally it happened. It was cool to see her out there shaking it with the younger folks.

After she retired, we went up to the temple to see the south african drumming. Wow! There was so much energy in the room. I was amazed. Drums banging, people dancing, and everyone feeling the rythm as if it was a part of them. Like the music was flowing through them and making them dance.

I sat by myself outside, back at the lodge, while Josh danced once again to the DJ. When he was done we headed into the karaoke room where I heard Shannon earlier singing Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Now I would have imagined that song being sung by gay men or women but never heard a straight man singing it. This kind of gives you an idea of how laid back people are there (not to mention fun as well as funny).

I belted out Lady Marmalade with the same ole fear that comes across me as I stand up in front of people making a fool of myself. I actually did quite well with the words I knew and hit the notes on key for the most part. The second half of the song was a bit more difficult and I pretty much stuck to the chorus. Everyone clapped and told me I did wonderful and I was a bit embarrassed. I headed off the stage into the corner with my face redder than a firetruck.

We retired to his room for the evening around 1am and its off to sleep. Thursday will be packing up the car, meeting his grandmother for breakfast, and finally on the road to SF to go HOME

Posted by Des at 08:19 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

May 01, 2005

Heartwood

Deer, Eagles, Turkeys, Cats, Bugs,Insects, Bumble Bees, Gophers, Spiders, and so many other creatures, living among the grounds of Heartwood.

Thursday night was coffee house, which was a lot of fun. I watched Josh take charge of a skit, not only that but he seemed to be tackling so much and making it work. Between coffee house, and graduation, as well as running his own schedule. It was nice to see him taking charge and making it work.

Friday I have to say was a bit disappointing. Josh left about 1:30 and I was feeling a bit alone. I felt a bit abandoned and was really irritated, wondering if I made the right decision to come up on Thursday or not. I wasnt happy with being put at a lower priority than what he was doing but I do know some things are more important to him, and I guess I have to learn to trust him in that respect.

As it turned out, he didnt stay the night as he originally planned. He came back to be with me which made me feel really good. Somewhere down deep, I was hoping he would, so when he walked through the door I wasnt sure how to feel anymore.

I was in bed asleep and I guess during the night I had mixed emotions. Part of me wanted to hold him tight, comfort him, love him, and the other part wanted to scream "you abandoned me, left me in your room all alone, on top of a mountain, with people I dont know, and more dreadlocks than Ive ever seen in my life, and 45 minutes to civilization with no way to get there."

We did quite a bit of talking on Saturday morning. I expressed my hurt feelings and he expressed his emotions that he got out of the ritual the evening before. He told me how much he loved me, appreciated me, respected me, and so much more. The words were nice to hear but the nicest part was when he described our experience in the cabin about a year and a half prior. He said "that was the night I made the decision to marry you". Wow... that really hit home.

With that we met Jana and Silas and watched Lemminy Snickets movie (sp?). It was enjoyable, however I really dont enjoy Jim Carey. He seems to make everything into a comedy and Im not so certain this movie should have been. It should have been darker, more gloomy, and with *that guy*.

After the movie, we talked some more. We went to see Sarah (who was fantastic at coffee house), and she gave us a tarrot reading both individually and as a couple. It was another emotional experience.

I almost cried at some things but seeing Josh cry on his really hit home. Seeing us together in the cards, really touched an emotional string.

For me, it was about conflict and change (who'da thunk lol). The transition from what I know and what I want to become. The fears of being held back or holding myself back for that matter because of safety. Seeing work as a burden rather than enjoyable. Seeing where I was going afterwards and knowing that its uncertain.

For Josh, it touched on a lot of his desires, fears, and emotions, which I will let you read in his journal.

For the two of us, we are a ton of energy, very similar in ways via our heart and caring. On the outside we appear very different but on the inside is what keeps us going. She saw the conflicts we have which we need to work on, and it was really amazing how accurate she was. I have to say, we left there feeling love for each other and feeling the love back.

So after the reading, it was dinner, back to the room, and then down to the celebration of spring. It was in preperation for todays event. They built a fire, and sat around playing the drums. This girl Jessie who was visiting, did a tobacco ceromony which was kind of fun to watch. Saying prayers to the north, south, east, west, mother earth, the spirits, and prayers to all that surround it.

This morning I lay awake, Josh is sleeping for 3 more minutes while I finish my entry. It shall be a fun day, a loving day, a good day for what I see.

Ill be here till Friday morning. Hooray graduation Thursday.

Posted by Des at 06:37 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

March 13, 2005

Spring has begun in March

So a quick recap of the weekend and some thoughts Ive had. First of all, I remembered two things I used to love in Rochester. First is the sweet smell of freshly cut grass in the summer time. I got to thinking about this because we were walking around last night and someone mentioned the smell of flowers.

I realized, we always smell flowers here. The weather never gets cold enough where the air gets stale. With that, we also dont get that smell of recognition when the nice weather breaks. I kind of miss coming off of winter and smelling the first lawn thats just been mowed. Guess it just doesnt mean as much without the winter to back it up.

The other thing I miss is Tara's corned beef and cabbage. I know I have probably lost my mind but you really couldnt get a better deal. $4 or $5 for dinner on St Patricks Day. What could be nicer?

Hopefully Ill find someplace to have my corn beef and cabbage and when I do, Ill let you know.

So this brings me to the weekend. Friday night I hung out with my friend Logan for a bit. We met up at the Mixx and stayed there most of the night. Being up since 3am, with out a nap, I was home by midnight.

Last night I met a friend out for coffee. Actually a friend of my friend Ricks, but ran into Brian online in the chat room and being that he was looking to get out and I was looking to get out, I said "why not go get coffee?".

Strangest thing happened while on my way. I hear someone calling to me and look up. Some guy (whom I dont know), says his friend wants to take my picture. *chuckle*.... who in their right mind would want a picture of me lol. Anyway, I dont care who takes my picture (I am curious as to why) so I let him. I never did find out what his intentions were but hey, its just a picture. He complimented me by saying I was cute, and had a nice smile. I thanked him and moved on.

So I met Brian at Sweet Inspirations which I havent been to in a while. You may remember it as being one of my favorite places from visiting almost 2 years ago and when we first moved out here. I like the place however its becoming "all the way on the other side of Castro". God, SF people can get lazy and Im beginning to join them I think.

Rick called while we were having coffee and joined us there. He had just got done work and was hungry so we all walked around Castro to find him a place to eat. He got food at this fast food Chinese place, and we went and had *more* coffee at Starbucks. Went down to Tower Video (seems to be the routine when walking around Castro) and Rick decided to go get a salad from Chow. Brian and I went to Badlands (my first time at the video bar. Just not my style) and I survived. We walked around Castro a bit more and finally I came home.

Today Im debating on beer bust or not and lunch with another friend. Tomorrow is work and can I just say HOORAY! 3 weeks left.

Peace out for now!!!!

Posted by Des at 10:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

March 07, 2005

I really need to update more often lol

So let me start with the weekend. Very relaxing, sunshine, about 70 degrees, and the weather says it should be like this all week. So, needless to say, I pulled myself away from the computer a little and went outside to enjoy it.

Friday night I hung out with my friend Rick. We went to the Pilsner and the Mix. Ran into a few gay.comers and pretty much just hung out. I was a bit nervous because I had never seen Rick get drunk but like usual, I went along with him. When I left, he was heading back down to meet his boyfriend Scott who was stuck at work until midnight. Ok, so now it was 1am *chuckle*. Im sure Scott was hanging out with his fellow coworkers at Chow or next door at the Pilsner. I really need to call Rick and make sure all's ok, but I just havent had the time.

Saturday I went to brunch with my roomie. We went to the Crepe Vine. Nothing special, just plain, ordinary food. I came home, napped, and went back out for a walk. I ended up at Safeway and bought a few minor groceries to tie me over for a bit. We watched the Exorcist: The Beginning which I was pretty disappointed in. Not so scary like the others. Chatted online, and to bed early. I figured Sunday was going to be nice so Id save myself for that.

I also talked to my friend Jason who isnt going to be able to come visit till May or June. His boss I guess is being a dick and wont let him take his vacation in April like we had originally talked about. Hopefully it will settle down but I think we were both a little disappointed.

Sunday I woke up early and went for a walk at 6:30am hoping to get a picture of the sunrise on the city. Well there was just enough fog to ruin any picture I would have taken so I came home.

Around 11, I went to meet my friend Luis at Starbucks on 18th. He was heading there to meet some bears and asked if I wanted to tag along so I said sure. Anything to get out again on a nice day. I hung out there until one bear about 6'4 and about 350 pounds started trying to make me his cuddle toy. At that point I decided it was time to venture on my own.

I sat at the corner of Market and Castro, watching people come and go. What a city full of life. So many people wandering around, enjoying the day. So many queers getting on the Muni and off.

I walked a bit more around the neighborhood and then back home for a nap. I took about a 2 hour nap and called my friend Jay and made plans to head to the Eagle for beer bust.

It was a good time but packed. Too many people turned out on the nice day and it kind of reminded me of the Forum on barnight. The only difference is that it was a Sunday afternoon and a tamer crowd lol. I guess most Sundays are like that at the Eagle.

Needless to say I was drunk, and home in bed by 7 but I had a great time lol.

Today was a good day for a change. No hard feelings between anyone and pretty much a smooth ride. We got the info about outplacement training on Wednesday and Friday. Basically they will teach us how to make a resume and interview and all that crap. Im just in it for the time away from work, not to mention it saves me 5.10 a day on Bart commutes.

Other news, my treo 650 works great and Im loving it. Just wish I got more phone calls lol. I would really love to figure out how to get more ringtones on there, so if anyone is listening and perhaps knows a way, Id appreciate the info.

Im also having trouble with my email on there. Seems to connect and send messages but doesnt receive. It goes through the process without errors and shows the status bar but doesnt download anything. Any info anyone has on that would be appreciated as well.

So thats about it. Everything is going great and Im looking forward to getting the next 3 1/2 weeks over and done with. Next chapter of the journal will be my first SF unemployment. Stay tuned. :-)

Posted by Des at 09:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

February 20, 2005

Shopping!!!!

Its been a few days since Ive written and being that gay.com is down (no chatting for me this morning) I would write a bit about the weekend. Josh tells me I havent updated in a while (although I updated Thursday and for some reason his browser didnt refresh it).

To begin with, my taxes went into my account Friday morning and Ive been on a non stop spending spree. Josh says I out did him which is hard to believe. Ive seen him shop before lol. It feels good to be able to spend money while I can. There are quite a few things (as Ive mentioned before) that I wanted and havent been able to afford just yet. I figure if Im going to do it, now is the time, even though Ill be laid off in 6 weeks. If I dont buy the stuff now, then I most likely wont for a while.

So to start off, I ordered my Mac-Mini Friday morning first thing (priorities hehe). I decided to get the 80 gig hardrive instead of the 40. Just seemed more logical for $40 extra. I have to say, the beginning of my relationship with Apple didnt start off well and I was a bit irritated.

The total with tax came to 788.80, however when I looked at my checking account after, it showed they authorized 800.63 along with (2) $1.00 authorizations. Although the difference isnt much, I still dont like the fact they authorized more than what the charge was so I called.

The first person told me it was in case there were adjustments that needed to be made, such as additional items. This wasnt a good answer for me, so began transfer number 1. The second person said there was nothing they could do and there went transfer 2 and 3. Finally the fourth person (whom I requested so I could complain) gave me another answer for the higher amount. She told me that their "system isnt capable of calculating the tax and is only an estimate so it will calculate the highest tax in the nation".

If I wasnt already running late for work I would have argued but instead I accepted it (still unhappy with the answer) and hung up. What I would have liked to have said (and I wrote a letter) was "You are Apple and known for your more expensive and so called superior computer systems. You mean to tell me that a company that manufactures such great equipment, doesnt have an authorization system that will authorize the correct amount of sales tax for the city of San Francisco which is only an hour and a half away from where your headquarters is?". Yeah its a long sentence but its what my thoughts were at the time (still are).

So the worst part that sits in my mind is not the amount but the cause itself. I was told "no one has complained about it before". Well let me be the first then. My bank holds that amount until a charge goes through. If you dont charge the account until the order is ready to be shipped (3 weeks), then you are holding money of mine that doesnt need to be held. I dont care if its $13 or $1300, its the fact that it is held and shouldnt be. I would much rather them charge the account the whole amount so that it comes off hold and shows as a charge. They should also advise customers that order online that the amount authorized may be higher based on this info. It just seems like good business to me.

Ok, so nuff about that lol. Im still anxious to get the new computer. So now the rest of the spending. Because the Mac-Mini doesnt come with a monitor, keyboard, or mouse, I needed to shop for those items. The monitor was easy. I bought a 19" from my roomie for $40 - Thanks Ste3ve *smile*. As for the keyboard and mouse, I wanted to go wireless to accomidate the internal bluetooth. All the combinations that I saw seemed way too expensive and after hours and hours of research and reading, I finally decided I would go with an Apple USB keyboard (which has 2 built in USB ports and works as a hub), along with a logitech wireless bluetooth mouse (8 buttons... what will I ever do with them all). The keyboard will use one of the 2 USB slots on the computer, and Ill have one left along with the 2 on the keyboard. This will allow me to plug in my printer, camera, and my web cam.

I also needed speakers which I found a 6pc surround sound set on ebay like the one I already have so I bought it. Its used but it said excellent condition and the seller seems to have a high rating so I figured why not. Im very happy with the system I already have so it would only make sense to get a second one for my room and for the computer. With everything, this computer is now costing me about a grand lol... So much for the "affordable" Mac. But just the same, its still a Mac which will be great for my photo work.

Along with all of that, I bought a futon which will be delivered tomorrow after work. I went with an inexpensive frame (since it will eventually just be spare room use) and a better mattress. The frame itself looked as sturdy as the other more expensive ones but was just a bit more basic. It was sitting in the back of the showroom, which from my experience in selling mattresses and futons, is where they put the ones that have a much lower mark up. Im confident I got a good deal and saved money to compensate my computer necessities.

So thats been my spending spree. Im currently working on my budget so I can pay Josh for the phones, and also in about a month, get some accessories for them. What I looked at already would run about $90 for a holster and bluetooth headset. That should be affordable the beginning of April. After that, I will be done spending extra money which will be perfect since my severance will run out the second week of May.

This brings me to unemployment. I called both the CA office and the NY office since I have wages in both states during 2004. First off, the NY office was MUCH nicer and MUCH more helpful than the CA office. What I found out is that because of my first two quarter wages being in NY, I am entitled to NY unemployment. If I dont use this, I will lose it because every quarter I start, a quarter drops off in NYS. With this I would also be eligible for CA unemployment after NY runs out.

Here's the delima. I could use NYS and get a lower weekly rate (only about $20 but its already much lower than my current salary), and survive (barely). Once that runs out and if still needed, I would be able to file a claim with CA. If I find work before that, my CA benefits will still be in tact in case for some unforeseen reason, I need them.

The other option would be to go the way I planned and file a claim with CA and receive the higher weekly payment (about $150 a week lower than my current salary) and do what I originally planned out which was to take some training classes and put myself at a higher standard for when I do want to enter the job market again in August. Problem is if I use my CA benefits and start a job that lays me off again, I wont be eligible at that time for any unemployment at all. its a tough decision and I guess Ill have to work out the details in a budget format on excel as I seem to be addicted to lol. Can budget money but for just cant save lol.

So thats where Im at. Yeah, long entry but if you made it this far, youve made it to the end. Congratulations if youre not asleep lol. Your prize will be in the mail shortly (however in the fine print it says Im under no obligation to actually send anything more than an email saying thank you).

Peace and best wishes and happy Sunday

Posted by Des at 07:57 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

February 07, 2005

Some Excitement, Some Disappointment

So lets see. I dont have a lot of time so Ill try and narrow it down.

I figured out my federal taxes and looks like Ill be getting back a lot more than I thought. With my bills being up to date (and early no less), I can use my next couple of paychecks, plus my taxes to do the following.

1. This weekend Josh and I will be going to Monterey for a couple of days. Im looking forward to it and neither of us has ever been there.

2. I will be getting my Mac-Mini. Not all the options I want but will get the ones that cant be upgraded later on down the road such as the super combo drive, the internal bluetooth, and the memory upgrade.

3. I decided to get a futon instead of a mattress. Although I could afford a mattress, it doesnt seem like the best choice. First off, Josh wants something alot more expensive than what I can afford right now (lol, go figure). This leaves me two options. a) get a full size mattress and box spring which eventually can be put into a spare room, or b) a futon, which will allow space in my current room, be used as a temporary couch when we get a place until we can afford a sofa, and then at that time, instead of having a spare bedroom, we could have an office with a spare place for people to sleep. The futon thing sounds like the more practical way to go.

4. We are both getting cell phones. YAY!!! Who would have thought I would have a cell? Not only are we getting cell's we are getting the Treo 650

Im really excited about it.

So tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. He may be leaving today to go visit his grandmother and we will celebrate our anniversary in Monterey. Cant wait.

Valentines Day we are going to Samovar for a "tea orgy". Actually its not what it sounds like. Samovar, is a tea house in castro which is doing a special Valentines function. It sounds like fun so we will be enjoying various teas and socializing.

Ok, all that sounds like fun but now comes a bit of disappointment. I still need to call unemployment and check the actual benefits Im entitled to, but the information that I got from a friend who has been unemployed is that the benefit is for 6 months and not 12. This means I will most likely have to get serious about finding a job around August 1st. Still cant complain but I need to have something by October 1st.

My thought is this. Im still thinking Im better off pulling out my 401k (which Im sure wouldnt be advised by some) and using the money for a training class (which I was also advised isnt available). This would then put me a little bit ahead of the game when I do go searching for a job.

If I can receive free training, then I will bank the money myself into a savings account and draw the interest on that.

Everything will work out fine.

Thank you so much for the support I received. I truly know my friends and you guys are definitely the best. This includes my family (who in many ways have been my biggest support all my life). I love you all.

Posted by Des at 05:54 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 30, 2005

Thur-Sun: Men, Cocktails, Friends, and the Mall

So much to go over since Wednesdays entry. To begin with, Thursday came and went without a problem. I got the prescription filled for the valium. They filled it generic and it was paid through my flex spending electronically, so I didnt have to lay out a dime. Very nice.

The guy on the train, from Monday and Tuesday morning, was on the train, however I was a bit tired, and he seemed to be as well. Again we didnt speak but I still couldnt help but to wonder a bit more about him.

Friday morning before work, I decided to check the "missed connections" postings on craigslist. Once in a while I look through them and Friday morning seemed as good a time as any to see if perhaps there was a posting. Guess what? there was.

"7:30am BART rides toward Pittsburg. You got on at Montgomery, off at 19th St. Monday, glasses. Today, no glasses. Let me know your name so I can say hi tomorrow."

hmmmmm, a few days late by the time I noticed but better late than never. I emailed him and got ready for work. As I entered Bart I looked for him and didnt see him. The train was full and my first thought is "Im gonna have to stand since I hate sitting next to anyone". Then I looked to my right. Sure enough, there he was looking at me and waving me to come sit with him. So I did.

He didnt get my email but it was nice to finally talk to the stranger. Here's the basics. I got his name, he's 25, went to Cornell University, has a bf of 4 years (monogomous), and also the other basics such as where he works, what he does, the area of SF he lives etc..

So my stop comes, and Im heading off the train, I notice the guy in the next car who works in the same building and Ive flirted with. I hadnt till this point told him about Josh and its been a bit hard as to how to bring it up. When is the time right? So no sooner do I get off the train, Im walking and talking with this other guy. I did manage to mention I had a bf and it didnt seem to hurt the situation. He asked me if I wanted to do lunch, and I of course said yes.

Today was his last day for a month since he is taking February off to study for his bar. Nice guy, and hopefully we will keep in touch.

Lunch was good. We went to Nicks across the street and I had the Chicken Strogenoff over rice with salmon salad. Delicious.

Friday night, I had made plans to go out with my friend Jay who had moved here just over a month ago. He hasnt had a chance to go out since he moved and wanted to get out. We originally made plans for 8:30 so I decided around 7 to lay down for a nap. 2 1/2 hours later I wake up to a voice mail that (which I just missed mind you) seeing if I still wanted to go out. Of course we agreed to meeting at 10:15 which gave me a 1/2 hour to get ready and head to the Pilsner. As I was hanging up from Jay, Ben beeps in, and I have an IM from Josh which I wanted to talk to as well. I managed it all like usual, however felt a bit bad about cutting everyone short.

We started at the Pilsner, went to The Mix, To The Edge, and finally to Daddys. I was drinking my happy drink all night (scotch and soda), and by the time we hit Daddys, I was ready to pass out. God I was a mess.

I left Jay at Daddys (hopefully he made it home ok) and went home. Steve was still up and apparently Josh was chatting with him online. He wanted me to call him which I was in no state to talk. I called him anyway only to realize I was much more intoxicated than I realized. God that sucked. Thankfully he let me go quickly (after realizing how drunk I was Im sure), and I passed out.

Saturday - Saturday I met someone new online and decided to go for a walk. We were originally planning on a walk in Dolores Park however decided on Golden Gate Park instead via Castro and up Haight. It was a beautiful day. Sun shining, about 60 degrees, and just a wonderful day for a walk.

The park was busy with people playing guitars, kicking hacky sack, volleyball, skating, jugglers, and so much more life going on. The smell of pot everywhere (it is San Francisco after all, not to mention Haight Ashbury). We sat on the hill watching people and talking for about an hour. Really nice guy and hopefully Ill have the opportunity to hang out with him again sometime.

So homeward to find Rob from San Jose here still (he came up to have lunch with Steve). The 3 of us hung out as I also finalized plans with Ben and Ian to hang out that night. Ben was coming into the city and Ian (who lives down the road a bit), I havent seen either of them in ages. I was excited to hang out with them.

All 5 of us had dinner at Nirvana which was great. First time eating inside as opposed to the back patio which is much nicer. Ben, Ian, and I started with The Bar on Castro and proceeded to The Mix. Ian seems to know just about everyone and introduced us to several of his friends we ran into. After the mix we were going to go to Badlands (not my choice), however after getting there and seeing the line it kind of changed our minds. Ian knew the guy at the door who could slip him in but definitely not all of us. There was Ben and I along with 2 of Ians friends we picked up along the way.

Ben and I decided to head to the Edge and the on the way to Moby Dicks for the last drink. We stopped to get pizza and I ran into a friend of mine who was on his way home. To Mobys and then home which we were ready for. I didnt have alot to drink so I was fine. Ben seemed to be a bit drunk which was cool that he was spending the night here. Dixon (the place he lives is about an hour and a half away).

So this morning comes and Ben leaves shortly after 8am. I called my mom and talked to my sister and my niece and nephew. I tried convincing them that its ok to be sluts and they should start sleeping around. Ok they are only 15 and 16 but hey, why not train them early lol.

Online I ran into my friend Rick who I decided to meet for coffee. He wanted to go to a bookstore. He took me to Stonestown Galleria Mall which I never knew existed nor did I know how easy it is to get to by Muni. M train, outbound, 4 stops away. WOW! an actual mall. A real mall and accessible. Did I mention WOW?

Great place with all the usual mall stores. Gap, Disney, Macy's, etc.... They even had an apple store where I got to see the mac mini's and ask some questions. YAY.... We had lunch on the food court and finally left to walk around the Castro more. We headed back to Starbucks on 18th and then to Tower. By this time I was ready to head home.

Now Im watching Dawn of the Dead (the remake) and tying my journal. God there was alot to cover. Hopefully I wont take so long in between postings so that it wont be so long to read and catch up on.

For those not bored yet or sleeping, hugs and best wishes and as always, thanks so much for reading and taking a part in my life. Its appreciated.

Posted by Des at 07:33 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 15, 2005

I Sang....

So today was the gay.com brunch. There were about 12 people that showed up. Screen names consisted of Rickolodeon, Scott5sf, rush_me, Lord_of_the_Bling, and many more. Those were the 4 I hung out with for a bit after the brunch.

Josh's conference ran late so he made it to the brunch towards the end. He brought with him his friend Laura who he went to school with in Cornell. She lives in AZ now and is in town for the conference. He hasnt seen her in about 3 years. It was nice meeting her and better yet, having her join us for lunch.

After brunch was over, Josh and Laura headed back to the convention. I headed across the street to the Pilsner for a couple of drinks. My intention was to go shopping downtown and have coffee with this guy I chatted with online (avidinfinity), however I called him to cancel. I wasnt in the mood for coffee for some reason and more in the mood to have a few cocktails in the afternoon. I called him and cancelled which I dont think he was happy, but it was better than just not showing up at all, *and* I was honest about it. Still, somehow it doesnt change the fact that I cancelled.

So we had a few drinks at the Pilsner and then went to Karaoke at Mint on Market. My first time at this bar. It was ok, but kind of small. Reminded me a bit of the Pub and the bartender even reminded me a bit of Greg. Looks wise but not the same personality although he did appear to have worked there forever.

After a cosmo and watching my friends go sing, I decided why not. So, I got up there. Mind you the last time (and only time) I did karaoke, it was a duet with a friend in Rochester and I walked off in the middle from embarrassment. Im older and wiser now and know that I had to finish what I started. So I belted out All That Jazz from Chicago. I figure if I stick to the songs I know, Ill be fine. It was tough.

After a few more vodka and cranberries, I had also belted out Me and Bobby McGee, There are Worse Things I Could Do (from Grease), and Razzle Dazzle (also from Chicago). Peoples ears didnt seem to be bleeding by the end which was a good sign. People were kind enough to say I did ok which was better than "you were aweful". Ill most likely go back and do it again.

My biggest fears are getting up in front of people, and singing in public. Perhaps not the most feared but they are right up there. I over came both of them YAY!!!!

After Mint, back home I came to take a nap. Josh came back and we talked for a bit. He decided not to go to his last session. I felt a bit bad because I was having some issues which kind of started a chain reaction and that was the reason he didnt end up going. His friend Laura called and I think she was looking for him.

After our moment, we went to Burger Meister for some burgers to bring home. I have to say, I wasnt all that impressed with them. Everyone boasts about how delicious they are but my burger just didnt seem to cut the mustard. The garlic fries werent the best thing either. We brought the food home and watched "Shaun of the Dead".

For those who havent seen this movie, it was funny as hell. People told me it was good but I dont usually go by other peoples recommendations. I laughed at many parts and if you havent seen it yet, I would recommend renting it.

Finally.... Death.... er.... I mean bed.

Posted by Des at 07:23 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 09, 2005

Friday and Saturday - rain, ants, food and cocktails

There really hasnt been anything too exciting going on this week. Pretty much stuck in the house and rarely venturing out into the monsoon weather conditions, only to go to work and such. The few breaks in the rain that we have had, Ive gone out briefly.

I did go out with my friend Logan on Friday night. We did a bit of bar hopping in the Castro. Not a lot to say on that except I met a couple of new people. It sucks meeting new people because I meet so many of them, its hard to remember who is who when I see them again. I tend to forget.

I remember when I first moved to Rochester, I had the same problem. Its so much easier for everyone else to meet one new person than it is for one person to meet hundreds. So with that in time, Im sure I will piss some people off because I cant remember them, or they will be understanding so that they will be gratious enough to endure a second introduction (perhaps a 3rd as well knowing my memory).

So we went to the Mix first. The mix is a nice little bar with a back deck and electric heaters going to keep you warm. People there always seem friendly and more than happy to talk to you and have a good time. There wasnt many people there so we decided to head to The Pilsner and check out the scene there.

Not a lot of people at there either. I had fun hanging out with Logan. He seems to know quite a few people. Stayed at the Pilsner for a drink and the went to Cafe.

By this time, I was feeling a bit tipsy, the rain started again, and I knew it was time to go home. So home and in bed around 12:30 and off into dreamland.

Saturday didnt have much to report. I met up with a few people from gay.com for brunch. We went to Bombay for Indian food where normally the meals were delicious. Ive eaten there with Ste3eve (the 3 is silent), and Josh a couple of times and always had a great meal. The buffet SUCKED!

Theres nothing worse than biting into stuff and realizing it is not boneless. Crunchy in the middle and ready to gag, I just couldnt down it. I decided to stick to the vegitable combo over rice and wasnt even satisfied with that. Ive been eating rice dishes all week (Josh would be so proud lol).

Despite the crappy food, the conversation and company was good. Ive met a few of them once or twice before, and the one person who I didnt know was going to come was a guy I met a few months back who moved from Rochester. He was the one who worked at Nasty D's and apparently was back there around the same time I was. Who knew lol. I have to say, he is cute.

So afterwards, it was back home where I napped, chatted, and watched a movie. For those who are interested, the movie was Secretary which was really different. To give you the short version, a sadomasochist woman, who continually cuts herself when under stress, finds a job as a secretary to a well known lawyer. When the lawyer discovers what she is doing, he takes on the dominant role and procedes to spank her for spelling and grammer errors, control her diet, and they begin a work environment of BDSM. *chuckle* interesting movie I must say, and I know a few people who would enjoy it. I know I did.

Dinner consisted of Firewood with Ste3eve and Calvin. My first time eating there and the food was good. A bit pricey for the portion but what do you expect in SF? For the Castro, it was moderate I guess. I dont know how often I would eat there but would definitely go back again.

After dinner we stopped at the Edge for one drink. Calvin got groped by a cute guy kissing grandpa. It reminded me of other people I know (and Im sure most of you know too). After a quick exit there, we went to Daddys for another drink. At this point, I wasnt into staying out again, and went home. Off to bed for me which now leads me to today.

Who knows whats in store.....

By the way, the ants are still marching in and still a problem. 50 degree days, ant problems, and rain. 50 degrees has begun to feel cold, and Im not so sure I could handle the drastic cold weather of Rochester anymore. Ill take the weather here despite the problems due to the conditions. At least theres no snow. *smile*

Posted by Des at 09:04 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 12, 2004

Down the Mountain

First off one thing I forgot to mention was the weird demonstration I discovered down on Castro as I headed for the bus Friday night. Not expecting much except running to the pharmacy for an umbrella and flashlight (necessities at Heartwood), I ran into this demonstration crossing the street in the middle, which consisted of a marching band playing weird music and a bunch of people in cheerleading costumes crawling across the street, doing weird sexual positions with their bodies, as well as some very sexual positions within the group. Being I had my camera, I had to take some video.

Click Here to View Video

(it may take a bit to load)

This morning was nice. Woke up around 6:45 (about 15 minutes before the alarm went off). I jumped in the shower. Now the showers and bathrooms are separate from the rooms, so I had to get dressed to go outside and walk over to the showers, just to undress. It felt good though to shower and freshen up.

Josh slept in till about 7:45 (not really sleeping in). When he got up, we headed up to the lodge for breakfast. Breakfast I have to say was delicious again (as well as unique). It seems the only thing that I didn’t enjoy was the carrot soup. You don’t want to know what it taste like (trust me).

After breakfast we left back down the mountain in order to catch the bus. I made a mistake in the time and thought it was going to arrive at 11:05. It was actually 11:40 so not only were we a half hour early, but had an extra 35 minutes to wait. It went by quickly as we watched the people go in and out of the restaurant. The bus stop mind you is a small space along side of the road with no terminal or anything. Pull over parking more or less.

The bus ride so far is going smoothly (I'm still on the bus since I didn’t mention it before). I'm almost home to San Francisco. All in all it was a great weekend. I wish there was more time but I have comfort in knowing Josh will be down on Thursday and will be on break for two weeks. YAY!!!! I'm looking forward to it.

I did a quick look back on the past year. Wow, what an amazing year its been. I cant believe Ive been in San Francisco for over 6 months now and finally feeling its home. I think about the place I was in as well as Josh and realize how much improvement has come out of the past year. Last year at this time, Josh was getting ready to fly out to CA, with no direction of where he was going or how he was going to get here. I was feeling like I was stuck in the same rut in Rochester, with no idea how we were going to make our dreams happen.

Now, with me in San Francisco, living life and Josh going to school in
Garberville, it almost seems like we’ve come a long way. Gone that extra mile, made it happen and we are well on our way to successful lives, together and within our own selves. Its quite an achievement going from just an idea to a living reality. I have to give credit to Josh for making this happen, since he was the one who realized nearly a year ago what he wanted to do. From there it was inevitable.

So almost to Oakland and almost home. Another thing to touch on, is I
finished the book Animal Farm. I read it long ago (about 20 years now) and I guess being 15, and not really knowing what politics was all about, I didnt get alot of it. I mean I knew it was political but didnt realize the extent of it. Now after finishing it for the second time, I wonder what the intent was. Was it about over throwing the government, was it about democracy (or lack of), was it about the differences in race (some being smarter than others), was it about slavery and the truth that no one is truly free. I guess all of these are possibilities to me. Ill have to research it further to find out what others interpretations are.

Another thing that I got from the book is how it reflected upon my life. Perhaps its safe to say many peoples lives in several situations but the one that truly got me thinking was toward the end, where all the animals grew older, none of them got their pensions, and reflecting back upon the whole experience. It makes me think about life. So many memories but can I trust them? Can I be certain they all really happened the way I remember them?

We go through life and with each day comes a new person. The people who lived my experiences with me, perhaps tell a different tale of the event. Im most certain they do. With each generation, its handed down a story and with each generation, the story is different. I guess its best to take the memories we do have and accept them as being as close to the truth as we can. Its just sad how memories fade as time goes by. Thank God for journals.

On that note, Im home again, in my apartment. My roommate seems to have taken fancy to the red head that I met last week in passing which is kind of cool. I seemed to have set it up or at least set the up the possibility on Friday before I left. Today I got home, they were cuddling on the couch, I went in the bathroom and there were 2 towels, and an extra toothbrush. We all know what that means. Anyway, we shall watch and see how it goes. Ill keep my fingers crossed for the best. Till next time PEACE!

Posted by Des at 06:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 11, 2004

Up the Mountain for Me

So Friday, not too much to report. I stayed home (vacation day) and did pretty much nothing. I chatted online, worked more on my web page and pretty much was a bum. Ok so I didnt beg for money or booze but you know what I mean. It was a do nothing day.

Friday night I caught the bus for Garberville to come see Josh. I realized Im not too fond of walking in the Mission alone. I passed by a bum in one of the dumpster who made several mumblings about keeping away from his dumpster and started to follow me. This made me nervous but at least the bus station was just across the street.

Bus ride was ok, it went by pretty quickly and I slept as well as one could on a bus. I have to say, it was definitely better than sleeping on the airplane a few weeks ago. The only time it became complicated was when this really big guy decided he wanted to sit next to me. Why me? He was the size where he just couldnt help taking up extra space (my space). Luckily someone got off at the next stop and he moved to his own seat leaving me by myself to sleep once again.

Josh picked me up with perfect timing. I stepped off the bus and before the bus was leaving he was pulling up. 5am, darnkess and up the mountain we go and go and go and go. I knew it was a long way up but didnt realize just how far. It was about a 40 minute drive on winding roads, barely paved (the end isnt paved), skunks, and who knows what other kinds of animals living in the woods. It kind of reminded me of living in the country.

So finally we made it up the hill and he led me down through the dark paths, past the lodge, past the temple, past lots of trees, through the lighting of a flashlight. Kind of cool but I havent seen anything in the darkness.

The sun had soon risen and I took a picture of the mountains as the sun came up. Unfortunately there was a lot of fog and the sunrise picture isnt all that great. Next time I guess.

Breakfast was unique. They make you wash your hands before eating which I guess is a good thing because you never know what people are touching. I had oatmean, fritata, and some sweet potatoes. Delicious but very different from my norm.

After breakfast we went on a nature hike down a trail and took tons of pictures. He showed me the temple. At this point Im beginning to thing how amazing, and full of life this place is. Theres an energy that one can only understand by experiencing it. One with nature, the earth, and ... well you get the idea. It reminded me much of our Alleghany State Park excursion.

Once that was done, it was time for me to help Josh with his homework. Of course helping is just what I was prepared to do. Hmmmmm does one really help with swedish massage if they are receiving it? It was pure bliss. I cant describe how relaxed I felt, how much better in general. It really felt great being touched, rubbed, and massaged and I have to say, he is really good at it. :-)

So on to lunch. Lunch was different as well. God, I met so many people here. We formed a circle, held hands around the food, and said a prayer before eating. Was kind of neat but again different. Im not really sure too much on what I had, it was mostly healthy, nutritious foods which Im not too familiar with but it was delicious and I even went back for seconds (but only after the bell was rung saying I could). hehe...

After lunch, pretty simple. Josh went to reiki class, I came down and slept for 2 1/2 hours. Woke up, worked on my web page a bit more, and now entering in the journal. I have about 10 minutes to get up the hill and meet Josh for dinner. More later.....

So dinner is over, we had lasagna (couldnt be better than billys) which was delicious. Still Im not used to the healthy foods and how theyre prepared. Its different but in a good way.

After dinner we went to the little store here for some healthy junk food (is that possible?). We hung out with Yana and Jim (and I dont know if I spelled the name right). She is pretty cool and everyone seems to be of the hippie nature. It reminded me alot of my old grateful dead days and my old friends of which I still treasure although we dont keep in contact. Its the experience in life I guess, that makes every moment mean what it does.

After that we decided to help with his home work again. This time it was for hydrotherapy class. The sauna was excellent. Yes, the sauna is part of hydrotherapy class which was very cool. We relaxed in there for about 20 minutes or so and finally came back down the hill to his room. Its 11:30 and its so time for bed.

Cheers to a fantastic day.. It was all worth while.

Posted by Des at 05:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 05, 2004

Cases of Coincidence

So to continue the tale of the library, on the way home yesterday, as I was walking the final stretch to my apartment, just before I crossed the street, I noticed two guys walking down the hill. My first reaction is to wait and see how cute they are. Isnt that everyones first reaction? So passing by, I noticed one of them, who was very cute, red hair, some facial hair, younger (did I mention cute?) and decided to say hi. Without wanting to look like I was being rude to the other guy, I of course said hi to him as well (he was cute too but seemed to look at me a bit weird). This made me wonder more about them, if they were together, friends, or perhaps just strangers in the night who met on a whim. It made me wonder what they were doing in my neck of the woods. Did they live around there, did they walk down the hill, so many question about strangers that you figure will go unanswered.

I dismissed it and went about my business at home and went outside after about 1/2 hour to smoke. After watching people for a few minutes, I noticed the same two guys walking back up the hill. They stopped at a house a little bit before mine and across the street. One went in and the other into the garage. Before I knew it, he came out on his motorcycle and drove away up hill. This got my curiosity a bit more. I wondered those same questions once again. Do they live in that house, are they a couple, who are they? Again dismissing it with the understanding, they are like any other person I pass on the street and never know anything about.

Until tonight. This evening I was online chatting and began chatting with a guy in Haight. He had wanted me to see his roommates profile, so I pulled it up. Cute guy, around my age, so I started reading it more. I noticed his *hot* list which had a number of cute guys that I could barely see so I started to check them out. The first one I pulled up, happened to be the cute red head that I saw yesterday. How odd is this? Now my curiosity is even greater. I noticed he had a boyfriend, which I would have imagined anyway, but I had to find out. So I emailed him.

Ok, so about now you are probably wondering what happened. That will have to wait a few lines while I go into the next coincidence. After sending the email, one of the guys Ive chatted with came online. He was down on Church and Market and we decided to meet for tea. I told him I had gone to lunch with a friend and then we went back to my apartment and watched Chicago for the millionth time. His response was "seems like the thing to do today. I have a friend who did the exact same thing". Deciding it was too much of a coincidence I asked who his friend was. Sure enough it was my friend Rick who I hung out with and came over. Small world. Rick and I had a good lunch at Sliders (Burger joint), and we got some cookies and junk food (I bought champagne and orange juice as well because Im a lush), and we relaxed watching TV. He left, I napped and that brings us back to the meeting for tea.

Tea was great. We went to this tea shop on 18th, and I really wish I could remember the kind of tea I got…. Ill try and look up the menu but it was fantastic. I have only been there once with Josh so it was nice to go back again. Scott and I seemed to communicate pretty well and who’s to say what kind of friendship will come out of it. Its nice to make new friends and I think perhaps he may be a good one to hang out with. He seemed pretty down to earth, laid back, and easy to talk to. He seems to share some interests so we will see how that goes.

So getting home, I received an email from the guy who I was curious about. You remember? A few paragraphs ago? He seems pretty cool and I added him to my AIM. We chatted for about an hour and definitely a nice guy. Who knows if either of these guys will become good friends but its definitely worth checking into more. I really think I need to meet more people, and although I have met quite a few people here already, Im not so certain how many will be good friends and how many will end up acquaintances. I hope to meet more people to hang out with and actually do stuff with. The kind of people you can go for a drink or for coffee (or tea), or the movies, or a show. You get the idea. You can never have too many friends.

So that was my day…..

Posted by Des at 05:03 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 04, 2004

Saturday, at the library

So its Saturday, I finally made it out of my apartment after chatting online and playing with photoshop some more. For those who havent seen my latest creation, you can check it out at www.desmondsdoghouse.com/Cosmotime

So I figured I would come and check out the library today and kill some time. Its free, it has wireless internet, and lots of great books right? Well two out of three aint bad. Its free and it has wireless internet, but the books are NOT up to date. I so miss Rochesters library right now. This place is huge but filled with outdated stuff.

Two things in particular that I wanted (which I know Rochester would have) is 1) books on photoshop and 2) learning spanish. I also figured if they had The Andy Worhol Diaries I would check that out as well since it came recommended by a friend.

Well all the photoshop books are out and not due back for several weeks. When they come back there is at least 2 or 3 people with reserve tickets on them. Same applies for the learning to speak spanish. Whats the sense of having a library where the books are always out? Andy Worhol Diaries? Dont even think about it! Im lucky to be walking out of here with The Letter of Robert Frost. Ok, so Im ok with that one.

*chuckle* well at least I am online briefly to post this message live from the place without learning. The building without books. The...well you get the idea.

So Im off to Castro and do some window shopping and kill some more time. 45 minutes before my muni transfer expires. Gotta hurry :-)

Posted by Des at 02:21 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 08, 2004

Grandmas House we go

So we are off and running. Josh woke up early for a change (before me actually) and we were actually showered and out the door by 12:30. Impressive for us on most occassions but there are a few.

We had a nice talk about us and things that have come up along the way. A really positive talk which helped both of us in many ways understand each other a bit better. We are going to try and set time aside to talk about issues more so that we can resolve them (in most cases) and not let them build into such huge ordeals.

We stopped at a plaza in Natomas and checked out Ross. I really love that store. I was looking at jackets and clothes however the jackets were either too much money for me (the leathers I was looking at) or they made me look straight. That just wouldnt due.

Its funny how looks change on a person. I never looked good in leather but when I was younger, I looked great in suede. Now things have changed so it seems. Basic leather looks good on me and I want one with a passion.

Anyway, I was looking for two reasons. One I was looking at jackets because I wanted to find something perhaps warm enough for NY (yeah that may be a stretch), but also something light enough for the Bay Area. Believe it or not, it does get chilly here and we've had days that didnt get over 55 degrees. Its definitely jacket weather.

I was also looking at clothes thinking I needed a new wardrobe to go back home with. It just wouldnt look good to wear the same clothes I left in (I think thats a billy thing lol). I didnt find anything in my size that appealed to me.

We left, checked out Michaels next door and headed on our way to Roseville again. We arrived around 3:30 and it was a bit uncomfortable. I guess its always uncomfortable around someone elses family especially when grandma is talking about politics and how she is a democrat *and* a christian, which most people have a hard time with. She told us how she voted for Kerry and all her friends were mad at her *chuckle*. Then in the same conversation, she proceeded to tell us that she is against homosexuality and believes in the morals of the bible. Although she is a wonderful woman, I couldnt imagine growing up here.

We ate, we went shopping at yet another Ross here in Roseville. Here I found a couple of new shirts which are fantastic and I cant wait to wear. Josh's friend Gregory stopped over and visited for a while. I fell asleep from exhaustion only to wake up to Gregory leaving. I feel bad because I was just too tired but I guess we cant fight our bodies.

On to sleep until morning.

Posted by Des at 11:01 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 06, 2004

1 Embarcadero Center

Lets see, not too much going on today. I played online a bit while Josh slept in. I just love photoshop. Ive been toying with different pictures since I read a book about touching up so Ive been trying to do certain things in photoshop to increase the desire of certain pictures. Im not sure how good it really is but to me I can see the difference.

After he woke up we went to 1 Embarcadero Center. Ok, how do I describe this place and do it just? Picture a fantastic building, with fountains, spiraling staircases, and beautiful walkways that go over the streets to connect four buildings. Each building has 3 levels that are as nice as the first. See pictures below for more details on the place. The one thing lacking would be the stores. They didnt really have anything that wasnt a "mall store". They had Walden Books, Fuzios, Tony Romas, Gap, Banana Republic, and a few other chain stores.

We did eat at Cheveys, which wasnt bad. I enjoy mexican (no comments on that because I know how you people thing!). Nacho's we're good, the enchilladas were good, definitely a decent dinner for a chain restaurant.

We came home, I played with photoshop some more and came up with this before and after picture to give you an idea of what Ive been doing.

This was part of Emarcadero Center

Before

after

Well thats about it for the day. Tomorrow possible Sacramento to visit Josh's grandma. It will be nice to be away from the apartment which I havent been in ages. If you are interested in Emarcadero Center more, heres a few more pictures I took. Till tomorrow, hugs to all.

Posted by Des at 04:43 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 24, 2004

So many days have passed

Well where to begin? Wed? Thurs? Fri?

It seems like every day Ive thought about things to write about and if I dont keep up with it, I tend to forget. I will try and be more proactive in my journal so that all you bored people will feel better.

Last week was a good week for me. Feeling great and just loving life. I actually went into work Thursday (which has been better as well), and refused to be anything but happy. I wasnt about to see anyone there miserable and it worked. Everyone seemed happy and enjoyed their day.

Thursday, for those of you who dont know, I bought my plane ticket to go visit Rochester. I am excited yet scared at the same time. Im excited to see the people I really care about and have been good friends of mine but at the same time Im afraid it will show me all the worst parts of Rochester, and help me remember why I moved. No public transportation first of all. Thats a bit rough. Also the negativity among so many people. There are way too many people who are constantly depressed and looking to bring the world down. Im also afraid I will end up boasting about SF and cutting down Rochester which for the city itself and my friends, I absoulutely love the city. Its just a different lifestyle from whats here in SF. I dont want to get caught up in the bullshit either which may be easy to do. Ive worked hard to change who I am and let go of all those trivial things that used to feed my ego. Now Im trying to be a simpler person who just loves people and absorbs whatever information about life one can learn.

So I am excited yet afraid. Im sure it will go smoothly and work out fine and I honestly cant wait to see the people who Ive kept in touch with, and spend some quality time together. So much to do, so many people to see. Thanks to all the friends who stood by me over the past 5 months. Its been rough but your friendships have made it a little easier. Hugs to all of you.

So this weekend.... Friday night was the Pilsner. Oh boy, it was fun. Funny how about a month ago, I went there and didnt know a soul, sat in the corner by myself, and would leave after a couple of drinks. Now I go there and I have met enough people to make it more comfortable. Some really cool people from the SF chat room who are slowly becoming friends. Anyway, I had a great time and met quite a few new people including someone who moved from Rochester and apparently barbacked at Nasty D's. He moved out here about 9 months ago to be with his bf (who'm Ive met before and really think is he's a nice guy). They are both really nice guys actually. It was interesting to talk to someone who knew Rochester, and kind of feel a bit like home. Someday Ill list the people Ive met from gay.com but theres too many to name and I would hate to leave people out.

So this brings me to Saturday. I went to breakfast with one of my friends from gay.com (online as papacito) and he took me to The Sutter Street Grill. The place was great. A diner type place where I had pancakes, a ham and cheese omlette, toast, hash browns, orange juice, and coffee for $6. I couldnt believe how inexpensive it was. Its a hike to get to without driving but its well worth it. Its about 10 minutes by train and about a 10 minute walk from there (you could catch any bus with the train transfer but then you have to wait for the bus).

After breakfast I came home, went yarn shopping (oh boy), and did a little bit of grocery shopping as well. Needless to say, I spent more on yarn than I did on groceries. Its really nice yarn (100% baby alpaca). Ive started on a new scarf which I hope to get a few done. Theres a woman I work with who does craft shows for Mary Kaye and said she would try to sell them for me if I wanted. Im debating if I want to let her sell them or give them away as Xmas presents. hmmmm tough decisions.

St3ve left for Disney World last night. I have the place to myself for a week which Ill be dancing in my underwear every night hehe... Lucky bitch, just got back from Disney Land about 3 weeks ago and he's already off to Florida. Blah.... Ill have my revenge next year lol...

Well thats about it. Its now Sunday afternoon and I will figure out what to do for the day. Hopefully find something to do outside since its nice out and the sun is shining. I still cant get over how nice it is and its the end of October. Sorry but Im just amazed by it. :-)

Hugs to all and Ill write more later.

Posted by Des at 11:56 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 17, 2004

P.S. .... San Francisco

Ok, the basics....

woke up, feeling good, chatted with some new people, made pancakes, and decided again for a Sunday movie....

The movie P.S. was to me, the same ole older woman, younger man, love story. Happy ending blah blah blah.... It did however have a positive effect on me. There was one line in the movie that made me think. It had to do with fighting good things and made me realize, this is what Ive been doing since I got here.

I have been fighting the change and not embracing the wonderful things this city has to offer. I left the theater pretty much dancing and loving life as I walked back to the muni. God, why have I been fighting it?

Some of the things I love about SF. First of all I love having access to the muni and love the fact that so many people use it and not just the bums on the street. I love the fact that I can go shopping to great stores like Macys, Ross for Less, Old Navy, Gap, Virgin Records, Tower Records, and many unique stores in Union Square. I love that Ive been to 3 different movie theaters and able to get there without having to worry about getting a ride or driving. I love that there are so many coffee shops, tea shops, desert shops, and so many great restaurants. I love that there are so many people who are unique in their own way and able to express themselves without a bat of an eye. I love the hills and the ocean and the wharf. I love the history, the buildings, the library (which I finally checked a book out on Friday), and so many other things about the city. And all of this and I havent even mentioned the gay scene.

Anyway, Im home now and loving life. Skipping to a new beat if only for today. I realized, I shouldnt be worrying over silly things. I should be out there loving the city, loving the people, and being who I am. Letting go of old fears, letting go of old mind sets, and embracing new ideas and culture. Embracing my life and making it the best I know how. Making it worth living.

Hell Im living in San Francisco... This is fantastic.

Another thing about the movie which turned out to be good for me and a first was that my friend Travin was either late or never showed up. With this, I ended up sitting by myself to watch the movie. Ive gone to eat by myself before but never to a movie. It was fantastic. It really gave me a feeling of independence which was a feeling of accomplishment. I did something on my own without the need to have someone there.

with all this said, I still cant wait to go home and visit. Relax and get to know friends all over again. Im anxious to hang out with people I care about and those who care about me. This trip will be about reconnecting, enjoying friendships, and above all renewing lives in our new roles. I cant wait.......

Posted by Des at 04:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 10, 2004

A Dirty Thing

Today, I went with my friend Travin to see the new John Waters movie A Dirty Shame. Can I say it was excellent. If you are expecting it to be perfect then you may not appreciate John Waters. This movie was over the top. It dealt with sex and fetishes in its most primative form. It took sex to a new level. It was fantastic.

Ok, so it didnt really have much of a story line but in my opinion it really didnt need one. There was nudity, lude behavior, and of course people of all walks of life including an adult baby, a clan of bears who take are in their most primative form (very gay and over bearing), people who puke on each other for sexual gratification, and people who are into food. It was a bit extreme but that was the point. To show that there are all these diverse sexual interests and to know there are so many people who perceive it as abnormal. I recommend seeing it. Fast paced, interesting, but the ending came apart at the seems a bit. Despite the ending, it was still well worth watching.

Other previews I saw that look like a "must see" are Straight Jacket, Bear Cub, and Dead Alive. They look very promising and thanks to Josh I remember them. I stopped by Walgreens today and bought a pen and a small pocket size notebook. I want to keep track of those moment thats often get over looked because it is in passing and theres nothing to document it on. Man, theres so much of my life that I thank Josh for.

As for the rest of the evening, Travin and I hit The Mix after the movie. I really am beginning to like it there. People are friendly, cute, without hang ups, and pretty much down to earth. I think I will go back there more often.

Well now Im home. I had a great day but still cant help but wish Josh was with me for the movie. Definitely his kind of movie. It was so sex positive. Next time I guess.

Hope everyone is doing well. Till next time.

Posted by Des at 07:54 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 03, 2004

Castro Street Fair

So I guess to start todays journal would have to begin with last nights end. Last night in many ways was an eye opener for me. Josh and I had a talk and it was one of those talks that you dont want to have but are glad you had it once its over and done with.

I think being apart from each other there are certain things that are left out when we finally do get to see each other. The issues that most couples get to discuss as they happen, are ones that through distance dont always get addressed when they should. Being that we see each other now ever few weeks, the time we spend together is quality time. Time enjoying each others company and doing things together that make the relationship special. With that, we tend to be in a better frame of mind and those issues we have both been having dont seem to matter much. Although they seem insignificant, they still needed to be talked about and we did. Im so thankful for that. I now know more about what he feels and what his perception is and he knows mine.

So this morning I woke up and was in a glaze, just thinking about our conversation. We talked a bit more, reconfirmed how much we care about each other and we remembered how we felt about each other from the beginning. Its nice to know that after all this time, and although we are both going through a lot of changes, we still feel for each other like we did before and still see those things that made the other special to us in the first place. I came to the conclusion that no relationship is perfect and we are both fortunate to have the other in our life because we bring to each other so many positive things.

With that told, on to breakfast. We made raspberry pancakes this morning with raspberry sauce. They were a bit soggy but not bad for the first time. Next time remember to drain the raspberries before adding them to the pancakes in order to prevent the juice from making the pancakes soggy.

So after breakfast we had cleaning because my landlord was supposed to drop by. Not that we needed that as an excuse but still the same, I wanted the place to look extra clean since we havent met her since we moved in. First impressions say a lot. Never the less, she never stopped by.

We took off to the Castro Street Fair. Wow! It was much like cornhill festival with more artwork in the form of photography and prints. Add in some leather, some massage work, lots of food vendors, some pro gay christian groups, and the sister of perpetual indulgence and you have the Castro Street Fair. Lots of guys and lots of people. We met up with a couple of friends of mine and pretty much kept to ourselves. It was a great day.

Josh left around 5pm and had to pick up a girl he goes to school with. Im glad she needed a ride and couldnt leave until after 5 because he was originally going to leave before the fair. It gave us the chance to go together and enjoy the day.

Finally, I took a nap and went to meet my friend Ben (he works at Starbucks and gets me free bags of coffee). Came back home, chatted with our friend Rick for a bit online, did some thinking, and now ready for bed. Exhausted from the weekend, I dont want it to end and just feel like I want to sleep forever. Ok perhaps just a few days but alas work tomorrow.

That was my day. May not seem like much to others but it was a great day for me none the less. Hope everyone else had a fantastic day

Posted by Des at 10:15 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

October 02, 2004

Love Parade

Today was a good day. I woke up early, chatted a bit with a good friend from Rochester, called and talked to one of my favorite bartenders in Rochester (as well as a good friend), and pretty much enjoyed the morning with Josh.

This afternoon we went to the Love Parade. The Love Parade is an annual event in Berlin and this was the first time in the united states. I didnt expect too much since I knew it wasnt advertised very well and I knew it wouldnt be anything like Berlins version which from the pictures looked HUGE. I have to say, overall I was impressed.

Although there werent as many people as Berlin, it certainly did draw a big crowd. We got there around 2pm and the dj's were lined up with their floats. People dressed in all sorts of outfits from pink hair to guys with plaid mini skirts. It was more of an event to celebrate peace and love through the music of the worlds top dj's. All kinds of music from HiNRG to trance.

The parade went for 2 hours and ended up in a park near SBC stadium. The most unusual part of the parade were the bunnies. Bunny peace, and bunny power. Its was very odd and different from everything else going on.

We stayed until about 5 and walked back toward downtown. We decided to try a new desert place that a friend of Josh's had recommended called Citizen Cake. The place was fantastic. They serve dinner as well and it was more of an upscale restaurant in the middle of the civic center area. A little more high class however they didnt seem to treat anyone poorly no matter how you are dressed or what you look like. The deserts were amazing and they served alcohol too which made us think of how much Billy would love it there.

After that we came home, I posted pics to the internet and updated my web page. Once we were done Josh gave me a session to finish up him homework. The session went well and it was nice. I dont understand a lot of what he does but I am trying.

So off to bed from there. A full day and enjoyable.

Posted by Des at 08:45 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 26, 2004

Folsom and other stuff

Ok.... God this weekend went by so quick. Im trying to think about how to sum it all up.

Friday night Josh stayed in Roseville. I never made it to the bonfire and went out drinking as you know from the last entry.

Saturday I went out and bought some rechargable batteries, waited for Josh. He finally got here around 5:30 YAY!!! I was still kind of feeling down about things but we made the best of it. We had wanted to go to the art exhibit but after rereading the article in the paper, it never said where the exhibit was. I tried searching online and through the rest of the paper but nothing. So with limited time we ended up just deciding to skip it and would go to the Shakespeare thing in the park.

Normally I would say that was a flop but there was some good stuff for me that came out of it. I had to figure out the bus schedule because driving in SF actually takes longer with all the traffic here. I got a bit frustrated but finally figured out where we had to go and how to get there. It was actually my first time figuring out the bus lines by myself rather than following someone who knew. That was an accomplishment and a milestone for me. Its one of those little things that is filed under the "getting to know your city" catagory.

So we picked up sandwhiches from this little shop across the street from my apartment along with potato salad, some blue berries, and a chocolate bar for dessert. We packed up the blankets and made a thermos full of tea and everything was bliss. I brought my new digital camera with me to take some pics. Hooray, we were on our way.

We get there and first of all the ground is wet. We were so far in the back of the crowd that it was difficult to see. The sound was so poor we couldnt even follow the show and Shakespeare is not easy unless you are listening closely lol. Oh did I mention it was cold down by the water?

So we left after enjoying our food and tea. A flop some may say but it was nice to cuddle with Josh, drink tea together, eat our food, and just spend some alone time together. Id walk on glass or walk through fire for those moments. So we left and caught the bus back. We decided to take a bus which I *thought* would take us closer to Castro. It did but not where I thought. It did allow me to take a picture of Castro at night which was great because I got to try out the night settings on my camera (the main pic now on www.desmondsdoghouse.com ). Ok so some of this has no excitement to you but was fantastic for me. We grabbed my roommate and went to Sweet Inspirations. You may have heard me mention this place but its my favorite desert/coffee house. Came home went to sleep at 2am and Hooray its "Folsom Time"

Folsom (pictures can be seen at www.desmondsdoghouse.com/Folsom )- Day in a quick recap. I wore my harness, collar, and leather cap(go figure), along with pea green cargo pants and boots. Josh, a jockstrap, cowboy hat, and cowboy boots (go Josh). I was anxious to get there to try and find several people I knew were in town from Rochester. I was ready by 11:30. Josh and St3ve (the 3 is silent and he is the roomie), didnt realize why I was anxious so they took their time. It was also new to me and pretty much *not* so new to them so it wasnt a big deal for them to get there. With all of that, we decided to eat first. Then St3ve decided he wanted to drive his own car (which is a 2 seater) so he could leave if he chose to. This ended up delaying things until 1pm when we finally left. I was frustrated at this point and just wanted to get there. Because of the parking situation and now driving Josh's car (instead of just taking the MUNI), it took us about 1/2 hour more to just find parking. We finally got there at 2:45 and I was happy to just be there finally.

I will say, there is a God because with my feelings of missing Rochester and in desperate need to find some kind of connection, I ran into Fugly within the first 10 minutes. He was there with Tom and Brian and although we only talked briefly, it was enough to close the gap on my feelings of homesick. At least for now. I then finally got a hold of Greg and met up with him as well briefly.

The rest of the day we spent hanging out a little with a new friend Rob(who moved from Rochester about 4 years ago). We ran into Ben, Steve, Tod, and Ian, along with a bunch of diaper boys. Ran into several other people that I had met here in SF along the way. It was nice to introduce Josh to some of these people Ive met along the way.

We split up for what we decided would be a 1/2 hour. Of course time flies so fast and it was a quick walk to 10th Street with Rob. I waited back at the corner for Josh who had lost track of time himself. He finally made it back there about 1/2 hour late. I was a bit pissed at first but finally let go on our way home. I can totally understand how time could fly by and not even realize it there. It happened to me as well but I was lucky to have someone say after only 15 minutes (its 4:45 now) which had me in shock. At that point I said goodbye to Rob and headed back to the corner asap.

After Folsom, we came back home, ordered BBQ for delivery (makes me miss the Dinosaur BBQ) which was ok. I got tired real quick and ended up just going to bed.

Here I am Monday morning recaping the weekend. I will most likely call in sick today 1. because I feel I havent had any time to relax this weekend. 2. I want to spend more time with Josh and 3. I havent called in since Ive been here and can use a mental health day.

Well thats it. If you made it through, Congratulations I know its long. Hope everyone else had a fantastic time.

Posted by Des at 11:11 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 19, 2004

Late Start to the day

So I actually slept in this morning until 10:30am. Thats really late for me. Seems lately Ive been needing more and more sleep. I had a few wierd dreams including one which left me a bit pissed. It seems I was walking down the street of San Francisco and there was a green light above me and from somewhere I heard a man on the speaker near by talking about the contest. I knew there was a contest going on that could win lots of money and knew you had to find a certain key to win. The green light told you where the key was so I went inside. Hooray, I was the first one there and got the key, however Josh came in from behind me and took it out of my hands. The girls behind the counter, including the one who handed me the key, decided that Josh should have it and refused to give me what we all knew was mine. I hate them and wish they would die lol (not Josh though because he would share the money with me lol). Just the girls behind the counter. Anyway, it was an odd little dream.

As for today, I am currently making plans with the roommate to go to the Apple store and perhaps Best Buys or Comp USA. I just want to get a feel for some of the digital camera's that are out. Im leaving complete control now of the camera I buy to Josh since I trust his decision with both cameras and online purchases. What I am hoping to do today is just see how powerful an 8X or 10X zoom is and see what kind of features are on them from an up close and personal experience. After that perhaps the Eagle for the beer bust. Last time I went there was a leather boy competition going on which was quite amusing. I thought it was odd when the Sir who was hosting said "Lets give it up for such and such". I never thought I would hear a Sir say he wanted to give it up for anyone let alone a boy lol. Ok so Im taking it too literally but thats my job in this.

Well on to new things. My sister emailed me on my journal entry. It was good to hear from her. I still need to email her back but its early in the day and Im quite tired at the moment and rambling. I appreciated the compliments on it and encouragement to keep it up. Its not easy finding stuff during our day to write about so Im going to try and keep some details about events.

If I have time Ill work on my web page.

They took down the giant pride flag that flies over Castro today. They replaced it with a giant Leather Flag in preperation for Leather Week and Folsom Street Fair next Sunday. Steve and I took some pictures of it. Im still amazed they have that flying over the community but it is SF after all.

So I had the chance to update just a little bit on the page. We went out to The Apple Store and stopped by Ritz camera so I could browse. The woman working there seemed to at least know what she was talking about however I havent decided if she was completely on the up and up. She cut down Kodak a lot which kind of urked me and of course cut down the Panasonic I was looking at. My guess is because they didnt stock it. Anyway, I did at least get what I wanted out of it and got to see what else is out there and remembered some features that I liked. We will see what happens there.

When I got home, I had a message from my friend Jay in Rochester. He is out here on business and moving here in late November. YAY, another Rochestarian implant. I ended up meeting him for a drink at the Lone Star which is the bear bar. I must have been looking a bit better than normal because everyone seemed to want to talk to me, touch me, and compliment me while I was waiting by myself. I met a few new people (who I most likely wont remember), hung out for a while with Jay, and came home around 9pm. God I hate riding the F Car when Im tipsy but Im sure theyve seen worse and it does take me home :-)

So home and then bed. Morning will come bright and early and back to work.

Posted by Des at 11:14 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 18, 2004

San Franciscan

Well its now official. I finally received in the mail my debit card for my US Bank account and my insurance cards for work. HOORAY!!! It makes it feel more official now that Im building things again that I once had in Rochester. Personal possesions will take some time like a bedroom set etc.. Next purchase is a new computer and then a mattress set. Dont ya just love my priorities? New camera, new computer, and *then* the mattress lol.

Finally finished creating new photo Albums for my web page. Scanned new pictures that Josh had taken from Dore Alley Fair as well as some I had taken with a disposable at the SF Zoo. Theres a picture of a rhino that you really should check out. The rhino was gratifying himself against a rock by banging his *you know what* against it. Its big, Its beautiful, and youre gonna love it.

Plans for today? NONE! Just relaxing. I may go grab something to eat but havent had the motivation to get ready. Ok, its almost time for my nap... Old people do that stuff :-)

Ok, so for the rest of the day, I pretty much worked on my web page. I did take a walk down Market and Castro, stopped into Ritz photo to see if they had digital cameras which they did. They just didnt have anyone to assist me and didnt have anything I really was interested in. So I walked down Market looking for other stores. I stopped in Radio Shack as well and they werent useful. I bought some groceries and came home and chatted online.

This evening I met up with my friend Rick online. We decided to go do something. Anything was cool for both of us, as long as we were doing *something*.

So we met at outside Starbucks and walked down Castro, took the F car going anywhere and decided to get off at Church and backtrack to Sweet Inspiration. My favorite dessert and coffee house. I had chocolate banana cake and coffee.. Delicious.

After that we walked back up to Castro and hung out on the corner and made fun of people. We had one drunk old man come up and tell us how drunk he was. He was stumbling and slurring his words. It was a quick conversation and I tried to end it before it started with a "hope you have a safe ride home" and left it at that.

Another guy approached us and said "sorry but I cant hold it any longer" and proceeded to piss on the side walk in front of us. Definitely an interesting evening. Rick seems to know everyone so he was constantly saying hi to various people as the passed by.

Finally he caught his bus and went home. I really enjoy Ricks company. He is a lot of fun to be around, and really a great guy.

So I came home myself and now I am here writing about it now. Im also chatting with Josh online (which I dont get to do often because he hasnt gotten his phone hooked up yet). It is the perfect end to the evening.

Hope everyone else is having a great weekend.

Posted by Des at 12:35 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 12, 2004

Ups and Downs

Well today has started off badly as we knew it would. Josh’s car wouldn’t start and he needs to figure out how to get it fixed as well as get back to school. I did laundry (as billy would say, fags are always doing laundry). Josh has been working on figuring out about how to get the car towed, get back to school tomorrow, and about picking it up when its ready.

So the rest of the day has been pretty relaxing. We went back to sleep after giving up on thinking about the car and slept until 3pm. We decided on food for the day and set out for the Castro. The first place we stopped at was a gourmet deli, which didn’t interest me so we left. We stopped by Harvey’s and ordered however with the way the day had been going, neither of us wanted to deal with bad service so we cancelled our order and left. The one waiter told us to seat ourselves upon entering and when we did, he quickly ignored us and waited on the group of guys behind us, leaving us at a dirty table and waiting for service. We quickly moved to a more visible table and got a different waiter who seemed to be a bit distracted. The original waiter was apparently trying to have dinner at the table next to us with some guy. I guess I should expect that in such a gay area that the gay waiters (and they are all gay in the Castro) are most likely trying to pick someone up. The restaurants seem more like the bar scene no matter where you eat. So with that and having to request my drink again after 5 minutes, we decided to go to Nirvana.

We have always had great service, great food, and great atmosphere at Nirvana, which proved to be, true this evening. We started with the sampler plate, which we seem to always order. I had the zesty seafood past which was fantastic and Josh had the 5 spice chicken, which he seemed to enjoy. We talked a lot about the poor service at Harvey’s as well as many other things. Seems like life has a way of balancing itself out sometimes. For everything good that happens in our lives, there seems to be something bad to even the score. I like to believe that everything bad has a silver lining and although we may never see it, we just have to know its there. Something good will come out of this Imp sure.

So tomorrow is back to work. I can’t say I’m looking forward to it but its life. I finally feel like I’m settling in more both at work and at home. It’s still a bit difficult to be in a situation after 3 months and still have it feel new. Part of me still believes it’s all just an extended vacation and cant wait for that feeling to fade. The other part of me looks around at how fantastic the city is and wants to embrace everything it has to offer. Yesterday we stopped at a public market and found some great oil and vinegar. Josh bought extra virgin olive oil and I bought mango and chili vinegar. We bought some naan and it was definitely a delightful snack. These are the things I’m looking forward to later on down the road.

Finally I decided to buy the digital camera that I’ve wanted. After researching cameras, I decided on the Panasonic. All the reviews I read seemed to point to the best value for what I need at this time. It’s only a 4-mega pixel which won’t really print the quality I want at an 8X10 size but it should print 5X7s with a decent resolution. It does have a 12X zoom which is a nice feature.

Well that about does it for Sunday September, 12th. Who knows what tomorrow will bring as well as the week.

Posted by Des at 09:04 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 11, 2004

My First Entry

Well this has been a great weekend. Josh came to visit last night, we went for dinner at Luna (which was over priced, portions small, and full of those loud annoying gays... you know *those* people). The waiter was very friendly and perhaps a bit too perky. He was a grabber which basically says he was quick to take things away from the table as well as constantly making sure our glasses were full. Most times I would say thats a good quality but it was a bit excessive.

After dinner, we went to The Pilsner because a friend of mine was having his birthday there. He wasnt there so we stayed about 10 minutes and left. I did manage to introduce Josh to one or two people Ive been hanging out with on occassion so the 10 minutes wasnt a total loss.

The best part about last night though was after we left. We sat outside, beneath the stars, on the steps and talked. It felt really good to talk about things we have never talked about before. It kind of reminds me of how much we dont know about each other and how much we still have to learn. Sometimes we take for granted that we are with someone and forget that there is room to grow even further with that person. It felt like we shared a bit of our hearts rather than just talking.

Today was nice as well for the most part. We woke up around 11:30 am (Ive been sleeping a lot more lately but of course we didnt go to sleep until around 2:30/3am. We left for fishermans wharf around 12:30 and kind of just wandered around looking for a place to eat. Since it is on the bay and it is San Francisco, the only options were sea food restaurants and cheezy (pardon the pun) pizza joints. After about 2 hours of searching we ended up at a chinese fast food type place. The lunch was moderately enjoyable however they were out of brown rice. What kind of chinese restaurant runs out of brown rice?

Other than food we stopped in a few of those fly by night camera stores that kind of take advantage of tourists. Ive been looking to buy a new digital camera so I figured I would stop in. Ive been looking at the Panasonic DMC-FZ10K which had some great reviews and pretty much have my mind made up. These guys didnt want to hear about the *good* cameras and once they saw we knew a little bit about them, they ignored us.

One place we stopped at the guy tried selling us on a higher priced camera that they did have. His selling point was the auto focus stablizer and "you can shake it and still take a picture" in which he proceeded to demonstrate the shaking of the camera. Josh's response to this was "I dont plan on taking pictures that way" lol.

So afterwards we were planning on heading to Sacramento to visit his grandmother but unfortunatly his car wouldnt start. I was looking forward to it and I know he was as well so thats something we will have to take care of within the next few weeks in order to make sure he is here for Folsom Street Fair.

Well thats about it. Tonight we watched an episode of buffy, had some coffee, and did some more research on digital cameras and features. My goal is to start taking (or attempting to take) more professional shots for printing. Ive learned a lot about what to look for in mega pixels in relation to printing size.

Thanks for reading my first entry to my online journal. Feel free to comment.

Wishing you all well and happy times(I will think of a trademark closing eventually but not tonight),

Posted by Des at 10:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack